


May only death do us part

by chiapslock



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Torture, It will get worse before it gets worse again and then better, Later on there will be hints of Allurance, M/M, Mind Control, Period-Typical Homophobia, Shiro is believed dead for 70 years, This start in 1936, Winter Soldier!AU, you know how that goes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-06-05 09:11:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 25,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15167405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chiapslock/pseuds/chiapslock
Summary: The future that Keith lives in is very different from what he had always imagined and dreamed of. Namely, Shiro’s absence by his side haunts him like a waking dream.He watched him fall to his death a hour and seventy years ago. There’s a statue of him, a monument of hope and a symbol of freedom, commemorating the Black Paladin’s sacrifice and the end of the first Galra Invasion.But Keith had never been anything if not a fighter and he’s moving on, putting memories to rest with the help of his new team and his job as a superhero.At least until his memories come to haunt him with a vengeance in the form of Project Kuron.[Or the Winter Soldier!AU that I started before S5 aired]





	1. 1936. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my entry for Supernova Bang. For those of you know don't know what that is: it's a Big Bang with a minimum requirement of 50K.  
> I started this fic before S5 aired, and let me tell you discovering what S6 was about made this WILD. But I STILL HAVEN'T SEEN THE SEASON SO I CAN FINISH THIS WITH NO BIAS.  
> Know that I love this fic so much I haven't seen S6 to write it as originally as I can.  
> I hope you can enjoy this and, especially, my partner's art. Which is INCREDIBLE.  
> You can find the art for the first chapter here: [boy look at this goodie](http://lucia-ik.tumblr.com/post/175550952839/my-supernova-piece-for-chiapslock-tumblr-why)

The thing is, after years, Keith has become accustomed to the void in his chest, the pain that never really leaves him. It’s a friend that has been at his side since the day he had first held the Quintessence in his hands, holding on to him when he had woken up in the twenty-first century and observing him while he had learned to _like_ his new life.

It’s a companion in the long days —when not even the team can do anything to make this century seem less alien, less frightening— and a bittersweet memory the rest of the time.

Keith thinks he’s doing better at working with it, at being the person he knows Shiro wanted him to be, and he’s proud of himself most of the time. He thinks destiny has dealt him a bullshit hand, but he has done his best to overcome it.

He also thinks he has done good with his life, and while he will never move on—this century will always be a little strange and unnatural to him, alien in a way not even the Galra were sometimes—he has built a home. He wishes still for the other home he wanted, for the crappy heater that never worked and the way Shiro laughed and held him closer, but it’s a memory he can think about with fondness now, rather than with despair.

Which is probably why he stops dead on the street, his flames dancing on his skin, when he sees the mask fall down from the person they are fighting.

Keith is tired, weared down by the event of the past few days, and for a second he thinks he’s imagining it. It had happened a lot in the first days in this century, where Keith would turn seeing Shiro’s shadow in every person, but those days are long over.

He knows no one realizes, because the man they have in front of them has changed drastically from the hero they are used to seeing, in ways that make Keith’s heart _ache_ : there is a scar on his nose, his eyes are yellow and cold, there is a turf of white hair where before it was all black and his right arm isn’t made of flesh and bones anymore, but metal as cold and lifeless as his eyes. And yet it’s indisputably Shiro.

Keith stays stock-still while Allura punches Shiro and the man avoids the hit, delivering a blow to her side, targeting her kidney; he stays frozen while Shiro avoids Lance’s shot and then punches Pidge with his mechanical arm, piercing the outside of her armor; he watches in horror as Pidge blasts a laser at Shiro’s back, hitting him.

He sees Hunk, transformed, running towards Shiro and that’s when he acts, flying towards the group and scorching the asphalt in front of Hunk, stopping him from coming any closer. “Stop!” he orders, and he hopes his voice trembles less than his body, but it might be a losing battle.

“Keith! What are you doing?” he hears Pidge ask, while he puts himself in between Shiro and the rest of his team.

The realization that he’s ready to hurt them if they get closer is chilling, but not enough to make him hesitate. “Stay back!” he repeats, while his flames extend towards them as a warning.

Allura hesitates, looking at him, and soon the rest of the team stops as well, uncertain. He knows they still haven’t realized, but he’s glad they trust him enough to stop when he asks them to.

He turns back, looking at their enemy. He’s standing up again, holding his shoulder a little tighter than before—is he hurt? What has happened to him? Keith banishes the flame away, not caring about anyone else but the man in front of him.

“Shiro?” he asks, taking a step towards him “how…?” he stops, his voice trembling again.

This doesn’t make sense, he has seen Shiro die, watched him pummel to his death and yet… he takes another step, hating the space separating them.

The man, _Shiro_ , finally looks back at Keith, but his yellow eyes bear no recollection. It’s like he doesn’t even know who Keith is. “Who is Shiro?”

 

**PAST – 1936**

Keith isn’t usually the one that does the grocery shopping, mostly because he usually works later than Shiro does, but also because he doesn’t like the cashier at their local supermarket: Herbert talks too much and seems to think that he has the right to know everything about everyone’s life. His incessant questions verge on the edge of inappropriate at the best of time.

It’s why Shiro is the one that deals with him: he’s better than Keith at making small talks, he has far more experience than him in dodging people’s questions and he manages to keep a polite smile even when he’s annoyed—a skill that Keith has never mastered.

Shiro, however, has been working hard lately, taking more shifts than usual at the docks and coming home later and later every day. Keith knows it’s because they need money, there’s rent to be payed soon and Shiro always pushes himself too hard when the deadlines are near the corner, exhausting himself to make sure they won’t end up in the street.

Keith, whose work as a mechanic depends more on the requests than the actual hours he’s able to put in, had thought he could do something nice for the other and take on the duty of grocery shopping for once. He regrets it now.

“It’s unusual to see you here, Keith! Shiro was busy? That roommate of yours is always a delight,” Herbert says, registering Keith’s items.

He doesn't answer, hoping against all previous evidences that Herbert will the hint and just shut up for once in his life. He’s not entirely surprised when that doesn’t happen. A little disappointed, maybe, but not surprised.

"Of course it's always a pleasure to see you too," Herbert continues, smiling, "but I thought I was making progress with him. My niece really wants to set up a date. Has he said anything?"

Shiro had. Keith remembers clearly Shiro dropping the bags in their house and complaining about Herbert trying to push his niece on him, while Shiro had tried to deflect at the best of his abilities. He remembers Shiro’s annoyed frown and resigned sigh.

For a second he wonders if he should say something and, maybe, try and help Shiro out with this, but in the end he just shrugs.

"That's a shame. He's gonna get snapped up soon that one, isn't he? All the dames around here flutter around him," Herbert continues excitedly. Keith knew that exact same speech by heart at this point, since he has heard it way too many times by everyone of their neighbors. "He might not be rich, but he's a good man. Of course then you'd have to find another roomie. Finally maybe find a lady yourself. Right, Keith?"

Herbert finally registers the last item and Keith pays as fast as he can, acknowledging his words with a disinterested "Hm." The other just keeps smiling, like he knows something Keith doesn't. Almost like he thinks he has got the situation figured out. Keith wants to assure him he doesn't know anything about any of them.

The thing is: Shiro is the neighborhood's darling.

They don’t live in a beautiful part of town, they barely scrape by in the apartment they have, but what made them decide to stay was the fact that the neighborhood, despite everything, was full of kind and generous people.

They are a close-knit group, the rest of the neighborhood, who chat and gossip and recognize each other by names. Keith tries to keep himself away from them as much as possible, but sometimes Shiro forces him to be a little more cordial, to make an effort to continue the good relationships they have built.

He understands why Shiro insists, even when Keith _knows_ Shiro doesn't really care about these people or their judgement: it has been useful over the years. They can't afford to move anywhere else, even living with two salaries, and the more people like them, the more inclined they are to overlook _some_ things.

Keith understands, really, but that doesn't mean he likes it. Especially when one of the effects of their community life is people bothering them to go on dates with their daughters. In fairness, they do it more to Shiro than him.

It's not difficult to see why: Shiro may not have the money, but he’s kind and gentle. He’s an honest man that has too much potential for the deal life has given him. A good man, in places such as these, is the best thing one can hope for one’s daughter.

Sometimes Shiro accepts to take out some of those women, hoping to discourage the invites for a while; sometimes he even brings Keith along, trying to force everyone into double dates that end up being more awkward than fun.

Herbert is not the first, nor the last, that informs Keith that the clock is ticking and that society dictates that soon they’ll have to find someone to marry, stop living with each other like those artist types and settle down.

No one of them has the money to live alone, sharing expenses is the only way that they can put something on the side every month, and even then, only by eating the bare minimum. But the idea of _marriage_ looms over their head in every conversation they seem to have lately. It is the one solution to all of their problems, people say, they just have to find a nice lady.

Keith never knows how to respond, so he usually doesn’t.

The trip from the supermarket to their home isn't long, and even in the harsh winter weather it's pleasant. It leaves Keith time alone to think, without anyone else barging in in his life and demanding changes he's not ready to face.

Still, after a full day of work and the distasteful encounter at the grocery store, the sight of his building at the end of the road fills him with warmth. Keith relaxes almost immediately, thinking of reaching the fourth floor and entering his home.

It’s not as big as some, he knows, nor as comfortable, but it’s the first house Keith can call _his_. With his two rooms and the living area with a kitchen and a ratty sofa that they had found on the road. Shiro had laughed and decided that it was the perfect addiction to their home, a street rat just like them. Keith had helped him take it up all the stairs and only because Shiro had looked so happy at the thought.

It's home.

When he reaches the building he enters quickly, even if there is no reprise from the harshness of the cold. He does the stairs quickly and when he arrives to their apartment he hurries inside hoping against his better judgement that their apartment will be warmer than the rest of the building.

The heater has been broken for months, and they haven't had the money to buy the spare parts, or the time to figure out what's wrong with it. Their landlord doesn't really care, and has been as helpful as he always is. There is a reason Keith has become a master repairmen in these years.

When he finally reaches their door he enters quickly. He looks around and spots Shiro seated in front of the sofa, with his back leaning on it. He’s looking at their heather, in pieces in front of him, and huddling under a blanket. He looks cold and tired, if it’s possible he looks even worse than this morning.

"What are you doing?" Keith asks, putting the groceries on the table in the kitchen.

Shiro looks back at him with a smile. "I was trying to fix it. But I think it's gone for good."

That isn't good news. Keith isn't sure if they can manage to swing the money for it this month, or the next, but at the same time Shiro is getting sick, he can tell, and they don't have the money for medicines either. If Shiro gets sick, he’ll have to stay home from work—Keith will force him—and won’t get paid.

He starts to put away the groceries and tries to think if there is something he can do to lessen the load on the other’s shoulder when he hears Shiro call him. He looks back and the other is smiling and beckoning him closer.

"The house is freezing, you can let them stay on the counter for a while. Come here, you need to warm up," Shiro offers, opening up his blanket, and gesturing for Keith to join him under it.

Conceding the point—the house is probably even colder than a fridge rich people use—he does as requested. He sits down beside Shiro and lets him put a blanket over them, so that they have to sit a little closer than normal. The warmth emanating from Shiro's body is comfortable, a reliable source that has accompanied Keith for the entirety of his life. It's also a little worrying, because he's almost sure Shiro has a slight fever.

"How was your day?" Shiro asks, while he still looks at the heather.

"I had to talk to Herbert," Keith only says, and he knows Shiro will understand, like he always does. Keith relies on it, on Shiro's ability to understand him even when Keith doesn't want to or isn't able to talk. It's what makes Shiro such an important figure in his life. He sees the way Shiro grimaces in sympathy, and that gesture already makes Keith feel better. The tightness in his shoulders eases and he, finally, relaxes.

"I'm sorry. I know you hate him," Shiro apologizes, almost as it was his job to shield Keith from annoying cashiers—the thing is, Shiro probably does think it's his job since he has been doing it for so long. "And he has been even more persistent with that niece of his..." he trails off, but Keith can see the tightness and the exhaustion in his face.

"You think you should go out with her?" he asks, even if he already knows the answer to that. Shiro will organize a nice dinner in a public place, somewhere people will see them so that there is always going to be someone to supervise the date, like a proper gentleman. He will let her smile and laugh and then, at the end of the day, get her back safely to her home.

He'll do it twice at best, just to pretend he's really considering it, and then he'll tell her that as fun as the dates had been, she deserves someone better.

Keith has seen this dance too many times to count.

Shiro's shoulder sag slightly, and his smile is sad, tired. He looks spent, and Keith doesn't know how to help.

"Probably. Just to appease them," Shiro concedes in the end. Keith stays silent for a second, letting the moment hang in the air with all the unspoken words they both want to say and don't have the courage to.

Keith likes to think that he hesitates for Shiro only, because Keith never had anything else to lose or to fear, but inside of him he knows that's not true.  He really does understand why Shiro insists they act so nice to their neighbors. Or why they have another room in the house they never use, or why they have to go on dates that will never come to fruition.

 _You have to think about building a family_ , Herbert had said, but the thing is they already have.

Keith takes Shiro's face in his hands and forces him to turn towards him. Their eyes meet and there are tragedies written in their gazes, stories that they keep locked in. Keith doesn't know what expression he's making, but Shiro looks almost overwhelmed by it.

It hits him like a tidal wave how much he loves this man.

"Hi," he says, trying to offer a smile. The outside world problems shouldn't be all they talk about in their home, the only place they can be themselves. If Keith could, he would just lock the door and stay inside for the rest of his life.  He wonders if that would help lighten the burden on Shiro's shoulders, if maybe it would erase the haunted look in his eyes.

Now, Shiro smiles. It's small, but real.

"Hi to you too," he whispers, almost as if he's afraid the one from apartment 4G can hear them. Almost as if he's jealous of this moment, and doesn't want anyone else to steal it.

Keith has never thought that their life is easy, but when Shiro bends down and kisses him, it makes everything else worth it. It makes the rest of the world disappear.

God, how Keith wishes it could.

 

He doesn't remember clearly the day he met Shiro, not because the memory has become hazy with time, but because he had been getting the beating of his life.

As a little kid, smaller than most, in an orphanage and with _some_ self-control problems, Keith had been getting in fights a lot more than other kids his age. He remembers how angry he had been back then, raging against the whole world and expecting it to punch back. He hadn't expected anything good to happen to him, and he had acted accordingly.

Then Takashi Shirogane, three years his senior, had punched Sammy Hannington—a bully that liked to pick on little kids—in the face to save Keith from a trip to the hospital.  Shiro had been an angry kid too, even if in a different way than Keith. Shiro had been controlled ice, a force kept at bay by only his strong will.

He remembers refusing Shiro's help after, and the other telling him he washed dishes at Joe's diner if he ever needed anything.

Keith still can't understand why he went in, a week later, bleeding from his temple. He just remembers the nuns at the orphanage telling him that another fight would have landed him in detention, without dinner for a week. Shiro had looked at him for a second before nodding and cleaning him up.

It had become a tradition, but Shiro always pushed him to learn to focus his energy in a better, more controlled way. To put all his anger and all his desperation on _better_ things.

Shiro is probably the reason why Keith is still alive, if he has to be honest. Most people thought Shiro was a fool, becoming friend with a kid that was more trouble than anything else, but the other hadn't really ever listened.

What Keith remembers perfectly is their first kiss.

There had been no possible concussion to obfuscate his memory, and Keith can still picture his clammy hands, the way he had known that this could have all gone to shit. He could have lost Shiro, and that was everything he had ever cared about.

Keith had taken Shiro's hand in his, while Shiro had been talking about another failed date and how much he didn't _care_ about these women, and had hold tight.

It's impossible to ignore what society thinks, even now, so Keith had known the risks back then. He had been called names his whole life, without ever giving other people reason to actually think he was gay. By taking Shiro's hand, Keith had put his entire life in the other's grasp. A power that no one had ever had over him.

He had expected Shiro to scream, to jump back in shock. Instead Shiro had caressed his hand with his thumb and Keith's breath had stopped in his lungs. The courage to look up into Shiro's face had escaped him, so he focused on Shiro's finger and the repetitive motion of its movement.

"Keith..." Shiro voice had trembled, barely above a whisper. Tentative and scared.

Shiro who was always sure, the rock Keith had been leaning on for the past three years, who had never hesitated in front of him.

Keith had finally looked up, and what he had seen in the other's eyes had been enough to make him stop. It had been like his entire had frozen from shock and _fear_.

He had never actually thought he would see that look in the other's eyes, never dreamed he would be in this situation. His throat had been dry, his words lost in his head. Every breath had took him closer to the other's face. Pushed together by a force that they couldn't control.

He remembers Shiro's lips—chapped and rough—and his light moan while he licked Keith's bottom lip. Keith remembers the smell, the sounds and the texture of Shiro's sweater, one of his warmer ones.

Every detail of that day has been printed in his mind, and he treasures them like a thief would his spoils.

There are always questions in his mind: of how long will they be able to keep it a secret; of how much of themselves they have sacrificed hiding away in their little apartment.

The truth is that Keith doesn't care. He would pay the price over and over again, just for a second of this.

A lifetime seems way too much to wish for.

 

When they wake up the next day, Shiro is burning up. Keith’s fears have been proven correctly and he hovers worriedly over him.

He knows that normally Shiro is of good health, and that a slight fever is nothing to be _too_ worried about, but the instinct is there. If they don’t treat it correctly it could evolve into something worse. And they never have enough medicine to treat it correctly.

“It’s not that bad,” Shiro rasps from under the covers. Keith furrows his brow. Shiro _sounds_ terrible, and that means it’s bad enough that he needs to take more than a couple of days off work.

It’s not ideal, but Keith can avoid eating for a while if necessary. Shiro’s health comes first. “You’re not going to work today. You’re staying here while I go to buy you something. I don’t have much to do at the shop so I should be able to cover part of your shift, you know they don’t care which one of us actually goes to work.”

Shiro interrupts him, weakly. “Keith, we can’t…” he stops, but they both know what he’s going to say. They can’t afford to buy medicine _and_ a heater _and_ food _and_ pay the rent. Even if Keith can cover a part of Shiro’s shift today, he’s not sure he can do the same thing tomorrow. And as much as Shiro’s bosses didn’t care _who_ did the job as long as it got done, Keith wasn’t as strong as Shiro and couldn’t work as fast.

Still, he would try.

“Just rest,” Keith says, more an order than anything else. The fact that he can’t stay here with Shiro to watch over him and make sure he’s fine kills him, but they need the money and he knows that this is the best way to take care of him. “If I discover you have snuck out to go to work I’ll be angry.”

Shiro has done so multiple times in the past, every time feeling even worse the following morning. Keith understands that he feels restless, but getting sicker will only make things worse.

They are lucky that Keith seems to have an impeccable immune system. Keith can’t remember ever being actually sick. Shiro jokes that it’s because he runs a little hotter than anyone else so it’s like he always has a fever.

Keith doesn’t really know why that is, but he’s glad that at least they have one less thing to worry about. He can stay at Shiro’s side and help him without worrying too much about both of them getting sick.

He looks at Shiro’s face, a little flushed, and bends down to kiss him on the forehead. His skin is hot and a little sweaty, but Keith doesn’t mind. “Please, just rest,” he says again, hoping against all odds to convince the other to do as he pleads.

Shiro seems to be thinking about it, but he must hear something in Keith’s tone that betrays how anxious he is because he nods with a smile. “I promise, okay? Maybe tomorrow I’ll be fine enough to go to work.”

Keith doubts it, but this is not the time to argue. “We’ll see. Thank you.”

 

Work—both his and Shiro’s—has left him drained. It’s late when he finally starts walking back towards their apartment, and Keith feels the strong pull of exhaustion dragging him down and slowing him.

He’s clutching the medicine he just bought from the pharmacy to his chest, trying not to think about how much money he has used. He passes in front of Herbert’s store, and while they have groceries at home, he knows that a good soup could help Shiro’s throat.

Keith knows that Shiro will be angry that he’s even considering this. They don’t have the money for such luxury. Still, Keith _wants_ to make him feel better and a nice soup would go a long way towards his goal.

Watching Shiro be sick is almost like torture, and while Keith doesn’t really know how being sick _feels_ , he thinks it would feel better than watching Shiro being sick.

Again, he can cut back on a couple of meals during the following weeks to break even, and he just _needs_ to do something nice. It’s selfish, but he just wants to make Shiro happy.

He enters the shop and goes straight for the canned chicken noodle soup. He’s feeling better, the idea of actually giving something hot to Shiro is making him excited. Not even the prospect of talking with Herbert is enough to diminish his good mood.

“Keith,” Herbert greets him, surprised, “I didn’t expect you so soon.” He eyes the soup and the medicine in Keith’s hands and he nods in understanding. “Shiro is sick? That’s a shame.”

Keith doesn’t have time to chit-chat, so he simply shrugs and hurries to pay. But Herbert, as always, doesn’t seem to be able to get a clue. “My niece is a very good nurse, she’s training to be anyway. Maybe I could send her to help and make sure he’s okay.”

It’s a scandalous proposition, even if he thinks Keith would be there. More importantly, it rubs Keith’s nerves in all the wrong way, already stressed by Shiro’s illness and the long hours of work.

“I’m taking care of him,” he says, between gritted teeth. He already knows what Herbert will say, how he will make light of Keith’s help saying that men needed the help of a woman to get better. The energy of a lady could do wonders.

He really doesn’t want to hear it. So he leaves the exact money in front of Herbert and takes the canned soup, walking out. Herbert calls out to him, but Keith doesn’t stop.

Shiro will be angry at him for this too, he knows, but today he doesn’t care. He wants to go back to Shiro and the safety of their home and make sure he’s okay.

The thought of Herbert’s niece or anyone else in their space is a thought too unbearable to even consider. A breach of privacy in the one place where they can be themselves without worrying too much, without paying attention to their surroundings.

Even Herbert’s callous remarks about Shiro needing a woman touch to feel better set his nerves ablaze. Suggesting that Keith can’t take care of Shiro, that they need something else, have always been hard for him to swallow.

Today is just a particular bad day.

 

When he arrives in their apartment, the house is silent and Keith walks towards their bedroom quickly, prickles of worry making his strides longer.

He enters the room  with urgency and calms down only when he hears the raspy breathing of Shiro. He’s still under the covers, possibly having stayed there the whole day. When Keith creeps closer silently, he can see that he’s still too flushed. The fever probably hasn’t gone down.

Keith knows he should let Shiro sleep, that he needs all the rest he can get, but the need to make sure that he’s alright is too strong. He walks up to the bed slowly, and, unable to resist, puts a hand on the other’s forehead.

It’s difficult to say if it’s gotten worse, but he’s sure it hasn’t gone down.

As gentle as he tries to be, the moment he removes his hand Shiro opens his eyes. His movements are slow and incapacitated by his fever. Even focusing on Keith’s face seems to be a mighty feet for him right now.

“Keith?” Shiro whispers and Keith nods, crouching down in front of the bed, so that they can be at eye level.

“How are you feeling?” he asks putting his hand on Shiro’s damp hair.

“I’m a little better,” Shiro replies immediately, but the lie is easily spotted. It makes the worry clutching at Keith’s chest ache. It will be difficult convincing Shiro to stay tomorrow as well, he knows.

“I brought soup,” he replies instead of starting an argument. They don’t have the strength to discuss it now, and hopefully in the morning Keith will be well enough to _out_ stubborn Shiro.

Shiro takes a moment to register the new information, and then he furrows his brow again, unhappy. It almost makes Keith smile to see him react exactly as Keith predicted. Before Shiro can protest, however, Keith moves his hand to cover his mouth.

“It will be good for your throat. And it will help you heal faster,” he reminds him gently. Shiro doesn’t protest, but it’s obvious he wants to.

Still, now that he finally look at Shiro and see the effect of his illness, he can’t help but think back to Herbert’s niece.

“Will we ever be able to be public?” he wonders out loud, with a wistful tone. He doesn’t know where this question came from, why he said it out loud, and he regrets it the moment he realizes what he has said.

Shiro’s eyes become more focused, and he even tries to sit up—only stopped by Keith’s hand. He doesn’t try to say anything, but there is confusion in his eyes, mixed with a well known sadness.

Keith knows perfectly well that if he insisted right now, if he told Shiro that he wanted to be public, to let everyone know, Shiro would do it without missing a beat. He wouldn’t care about society or what anyone would say. He would sacrifice anything to give Keith what he wanted.

It’s why Keith stops. It’s why he doesn’t dare to voice any of this out loud. Usually they both keep their desires locked, hidden from view. They both suffer from it, but saying anything out loud would be dangerous.

They are not ready for the consequences. No one would be.

“What happened?” Shiro asks him, his voice low and worried. Shiro seems to be fragile now, just like their life together, bound to disappear sooner or later. Keith won’t let him be taken away. Will fight teeth and nails to keep them together. Sometimes that means giving up on things they both want more than anything else.

“It’s nothing, really,” He reassures Shiro then, getting up. “I’m going to make your soup now.” What they have now, the moments inside their apartment, are worth everything he has to sacrifice for them.

“Keith,” Shiro calls him back, his voice still a little raspy from his fever and his sadness, “I love you.”

Whatever else will happen, whatever else will await them, Keith’s response to that will always be: “I love you too.”

 

Talks of the war on the other side of the ocean have spread fast. They talk about Germans, and Hitler; but they also talk about Japan.

Keith sees the way some people look at Shiro now, even if they don't know that Shiro has been in the States his entire life, that Shiro's _parents_ had been in the states their entire life.

He also sees the way it makes Shiro frown, almost as if he wants to do _something_ about it. Because isn't that how Shiro is?

They don't really talk about it. Keith doesn't really think it's something that should matter to them. They already have enough problems of their own without adding an entire _war_ into the mix.

Only once Shiro looks at him and asks him, serious and a little tired, "don't you ever think you were meant for something more?"

Keith can't lie. He feels restless every day, locked in a life that offers them nothing but eventual heartbreak. But the idea of leaving their life to go to war?  He does want to make a difference, but he knows the price they could pay. There are horrors beyond their imagination hidden in the propaganda and the little cartoons, there are lives being lost every second.

"I think I was meant to live with you," it's what he answers in the end. All his untamed energy, all his uncontrolled fire, he can put them all away if it means sharing a life—however plain, however boring— with Shiro.

But the truth is that Shiro was always the dreamer between them, while Keith knew life could take away as easily at it gives. Keith should have known, probably, what was going to happen.

 

One day Shiro returns home late. Keith can see in the slope of his shoulder, on the way he hesitates in putting down the keys, that there is something Shiro is dreading telling him.

A secret that hangs in the hair, as visible as an open wound.

"What happened?" he asks, before Shiro can even greet him. The tension around them skyrockets, and the other stands as still as a board.

"I went to a recruitment center today," Shiro admits, and a part of Keith breaks.

He should have known, really, that Shiro isn't one for sitting idly. He sees a problem, he sees a little kid getting beaten up, and he has to act.  Keith loves this part of him, but now he hates it too. He doesn't say anything, unable to think about what he _should_ say. Shiro takes his silence in strides and keeps going.

Brave, but stupid.

"I just wanted to see, I didn't want to actually sign up. I just..." he stops, but he doesn't need to explain, Keith already knows.

It's just that he hates that he knows. Hates that he understands why Shiro does what he does, thinks what he thinks. He hates that it’s the reason why he loves him.

Again, he doesn’t say anything, leaves Shiro to stew for a while. Keith knows he’s going to regret everything he will say and he wants to delay the inevitable, let Shiro explain. He wants to hope that the other can say something, anything, to stop the oncoming storm brewing thunderous inside him.

“There was someone there who talked to me about a project. It’s… They said it could change the fate of the war,” Shiro explains, with a spark in his eyes, “it could put an _end_ to it.”

“What? A weapon of mass destruction?” Keith asks, with as much venom has he can muster. He sees Shiro take the blow, but come out with even more resolve.

He has already made his decision, and the fact that he’s here to convince Keith and not to hear his opinion hurts.

“No. A way to make peace!” he really does believe it. Keith can see it. It’s even worse.

“Don’t you understand how this works? They don’t care about peace. No one but the poor people care about peace, Shiro!” he tries, pushes, even when he knows Shiro’s mind won’t be changed.

“Then it’s our job to do something. We have to act! Don’t _you_ care about peace, Keith?” Shiro asks, getting a little closer. God, Keith wants to punch him.

“I care about you, you idiot!” he screams, fuck the woman of apartment 4G. “I care about _you_ being safe.”

The admission, even if it can’t be news to him, seems to shock Shiro for a second. Keith’s vehemence maybe, or the way his voice cracks slightly on the last word. It makes him pause, but not stop.

“Do you think it’s safe here? The situation is getting worse. I know you know. There are people at the docks that look at me all the time,” Shiro says, and this is the first time Keith ears about this. “The propaganda is getting worse every day. I can hide what we have, even if I don’t like to, but there’s nothing I can do about my skin, Keith.”

The finality of it, even if Keith had already suspected, makes him even angrier. “So you didn’t even ask me. Is this just to inform me that you’re going away?”

Shiro hesitates before taking another step forward. "I'm... I hoped you would understand. We have talked about this..."

"Once. When you were twenty. That was three years ago, Shiro!" Keith explodes, feeling the anger rise towards his throat. He knows himself, knows what's going to happen. For all the control Shiro had taught him in all these years, there will always be something vicious inside him; an animal that bares its teeth when it's threatened. "What should I do, wait here for you to get killed? Enroll myself too, so we can be split to two different sides of the world?"

Shiro shakes his head and seems to be thinking, almost as if he hadn't really thought of Keith's role in this. _No shit_.

"Being a soldier means a steadier income than what we have now," Shiro starts after a second, "you don't have to... we can fix the heater. And maybe when it's over find a nicer place."

Keith scoff, incredulous. He wants to shake Shiro, make him _see_ the terrible mistake he's making. This terrible thing that he has now put in front of them, a choice impossible to accept. "A steady income means shit if you're dead, Shiro!" he barks, ire and bile dancing in his stomach. "What do you think will happen in the end? Do you know how many soldiers die every day?" How can he not see? how can he not understand? "You think you'll be one of the lucky ones? When have we ever been the lucky ones?"

"We met each other," Shiro answers, ready and sure, with a certainty that Keith _hates_ . Shiro is not allowed to be romantic when he's the one that made the choice without consulting Keith. He's not allowed to say things like that when he's _leaving_.

"Fuck off, Takashi," Keith screams, "you want to go and die that badly? Fine. Go."

"Keith, come on..." Shiro advances more, tries to take Keith's arm, but Keith furious and his entire skin is aflame. He doesn't want to be touched, he doesn't want to be calmed down. He's _right_.

"No. This was your decision," he reminds Shiro, looking at him with all the anger he can muster, "now go away."

Keith walks away then and sits himself down on their stupid couch. Shiro looks at him, lost and scared, but Keith doesn't have any reassurances to give.

This is Shiro's choice, he has to live with it now.

It takes a minute for Shiro to move then, to enter their bedroom and start making a bag. Keith can't see him, refuses to get up and look, but he can hear his footsteps and the sound of their closet.

Keith wants to scream to cover any other noise.

It takes ten minutes for Shiro to gather everything he needs—they never had much to begin with, after all—and he stands behind Keith. Keith can't see him, he refuses to look back, the force of the betrayal stings too much.

It's obvious that Shiro wants to do something, but he doesn't.

"I love you, Keith," Shiro tells him, with that tone that means he's smiling even if he doesn't want to. "I will write to you soon, okay?"

Keith doesn't answer. Doesn't move until the door closes behind Shiro.

The small house that was always a little too small for both of them feels endless. Keith looks around and realizes that it will never be full again.

He refuses to cry.


	2. 1936. Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A week later, as promised, chapter 2. I can't say much, but... I'm sorry?
> 
> As always you can look at the amazing art by my artist Lucia done for chapter two. Find the link [here](http://lucia-ik.tumblr.com/post/175789780439/my-second-art-piece-for-chiapslocks-story-may) and shower her with love!

The day after Shiro leaves, Keith goes to work. Buys groceries from _Chatty Herbert_ and returns home.

He buys too much but doesn't say anything while he puts all the food in its proper place.

He's tired, he hasn't slept at all, and he has still yesterday’s clothes on because he refuses to open the door and look at the spaces where Shiro used to be. He looks at the knife, the only thing left with him after the fire that killed his parents, and wonders why he always ended up alone.

Three days after Shiro leaves, Keith buys another heater. The blanket isn't warm enough, and he has been shivering for two days straight—he knows it's not the blanket's fault, but he can't go to the store to buy Shiro so this will have to do. When the woman of apartment 4G asks him where his 'dashing housemate' is, he doesn't answer.

Five days after Shiro leaves, Keith stays in bed and thinks about all the things he should have said, all the things he let his pride and anger stop him from saying. If that was the last time he will ever see Shiro again, Keith will regret not saying that he loves him back. The words will haunt him for the rest of his life.

They can't be honest in letters, especially now that Shiro is part of the military, and their exchanges will be half-truths and metaphors.

Keith needs a last kiss. He needs a proper goodbye.

It doesn't matter how angry he still is, the loss of Shiro in his life is a wound that will never heal.

Seven days after Shiro leaves, Shiro comes back.

 

 

Keith is in front of the new heater, not really feeling any of the warmth he should be feeling, sitting this close to it when he hears the door open behind him.

No one but he and Shiro have the keys since they didn't trust their landlord and changed the lock without informing him. Keith looks back, disbelieving, and he watches as Shiro enters the house, a little hesitantly. Almost as if he's not sure he can anymore.

When he turns and spots Keith seated on the sofa he relaxes immediately, even if he looks uncertain still. Shiro looks tired, or so Keith thinks, and a little weary. He looks like he has aged months in this single week.

"Keith..." Shiro says, but Keith doesn't let him say anymore. He sits up, and vaults over the stupid sofa to reach Shiro's neck and force him to bend forward and kiss him.

Keith tries to put into the kiss everything he feels, every single emotion that he has kept at bay this hellish week. He still resents Shiro for the choice he has made, but it's not important right now.

If this is Shiro coming back before being shipped somewhere, this time Keith won't have any regrets. This time Keith will make the right choice. Shiro melts into the kiss, hugging him and drawing Keith impossibly closer, so much that the angle of the kiss becomes awkward. They don't stop.

"I love you too," Keith whispers on Shiro's lips, repeats almost like a prayer, hoping it will help them find a solution.

Shiro's hand gets under Keith's shirt, but it has nothing of the softness that usually accompanies Shiro's touch. There is an urgency to it, an almost feverish resolve to make sure Keith is here and alive.

A week and Shiro is already breaking.

"I'm sorry," Shiro says, when they finally stop kissing for more than ten seconds, "I know what I did was terrible."

"It was. I don't forgive you, but I love you," Keith assures immediately because it doesn't matter how much he does love the other, he's not going to pretend that he isn’t still hurt.

Shiro laughs, but there is something sad in him, anguished. "I know. God, Keith, I... it all became a mess."

"It's all right I..." he doesn't know what to say, how to make Shiro feel better. There is nothing he can do, not a single thing he can say to change the situation they are in.

Before he can try, however, Shiro stops him. "No, you don't know. I shouldn't tell you, I'm under so many contracts but..." Shiro stops and looks up at the windows, almost as if he expects someone to be there.

Keith looks behind him too, suddenly worried. "Shiro, what's going on?"

The other doesn't respond immediately, but takes Keith's hands and guides him in front of the new heater. Shiro smiles seeing it, and looks back at Keith, "not even you with your freakishly hot temperature could resist, eh?”

Keith doesn't know what to say, how to explain that the house had been too cold without him. He hopes Shiro understands anyway. "What happened, Shiro?" he asks again because he recognizes a stalling tactic when he sees one.

Shiro smiles sadly, before looking back at the heater. "I told you that I was chosen for that project. They had explained some of it, the Paladin Project. It was supposed to be a new division, full of supersoldiers."

Keith blinks, surprised, "Supersoldiers?" he asks, disbelieving and Shiro smiles.

"Yeah. Super strength, super speed. A division of unstoppable soldiers, so that less and less of our own would have to die," Shiro explains, looking at their intertwined hands. "And that's not even the strangest thing I've heard this week. Apparently, there is a division in the enemy's army that's... you're not going to believe me," Shiro mutters, looking a little embarrassed. Keith has difficulties believing him even now, so he can't even fathom what Shiro thinks would be stranger than this.

Still, he needs to know. "Tell me," he urges, and Shiro folds easily, the weight of this making him sag on himself. Shiro has always been a beautiful man, always in shape, but Keith notices now that he has more muscles.

"The serum was created fusing human genes with... alien ones," Shiro admits in the end and Keith stops and looks up, startled.

"Wait. Aliens?" he asks, dumbfounded. He can admit that is not where he had thought the conversation would have gone to.

"I know it sounds crazy, okay?" Shiro says immediately, looking at Keith with a frantic look in his eyes, "and I know you don't believe me. But it's true! Ulaz was the one who shared his genetic code and developed the serum. It's supposed to enhance human abilities way beyond their possibilities."

Keith still can't really believe this, but he sees Shiro does. He wonders what they have done to him if maybe this experimentation has made him crazy. Or sick.

"But then..." Shiro stops and he seems to be struggling to organize his own thoughts, "you have to understand there was supposed to be more people. More... we were supposed to be a unit. But we were attacked during the experiment. Ulaz is dead. He refused to share the formula and even then, we would need a live Galra to synthesize it."

"Galra." Keith repeats and Shiro nods, with a little smile.

"It's how they are called. Ulaz explained some things, but I don't think now it's the time really. The point is it's... it's just me." He says it like it's a matter of fact, like he doesn't know what to do with the information. He looks lost.

"Shiro..." Keith tries, putting a hand on the other's cheek and Shiro leans into it, almost unable to resist.

"There were supposed to be hundreds. But it's just me, and I don't think people are exactly happy to have a Japanese man as the only American Supersoldier," he says with a self-deprecating smile.

Keith still doesn't know what to say about it, if he even believes it, but he shakes his head and says, with all the conviction he has: "They are idiots then, Shiro."

"Are they?" Shiro replies instantly, "because what can I do on my own? I mean I can lift this sofa with you on it easily, but how does that even help?"

"It... Wait, what?" Keith blinks, surprised, and looks around, "You can't do that."

"I'm a supersoldier, of course I can," Shiro says, and before Keith can say anything else the other is getting up and bending down. In a second Keith is in the air and the sofa is held firmly in Shiro's hands. _Holy shit_.

"See? I don't even feel it," Shiro tells him, with a little playful smile.

Keith takes a second to absorb the information before saying, slow, "You are a supersoldier, what the fuck?"

Shiro laughs out loud, almost dropping the couch on the spot. "Yes, I told you!"

"I thought you were crazy!" Keith justifies, immediately, "like who believes someone who says they have super strength? Or someone who talks about _aliens_!”

Shiro puts the couch back down, still smiling, and for a second Keith forgets about this terrible week, and thinks about the years of happiness spent in this very room.

He feels like a decision that has been brewing inside him is cementing itself.

"You're the only one," Keith says then, trying to understand what he can. Shiro nods and Keith tries to _think_ , "they aren't going to let you waste your time here when you are their only weapon."

Shiro fidgets for a second before nodding, "The only thing I know is that they want to make me take some missions. On my own, everyone else would slow me down. So I will train for a while and then... yeah."

The thought of Shiro fighting in a war with other soldiers had already been too much for Keith, but thinking Shiro alone in his missions is unbearable. The astronomical possibilities of them being assigned together have been the only thing stopping Keith until now. This changes everything.

"No. I'm coming with you," Keith says, with a determined look. "I'm not letting you go alone. You tell them I go with you, or they can't have you."

Shiro looks stunned for a second. "I don't think it works like that..." he tries, but he's smiling, relieved. Keith is ready to kill all the aliens in the galaxy for that smile.

"Of course it does. You were mine _first_ ," he snarls, touching Shiro's neck.

He doesn't care about what this experiment has done, he doesn't even care about all this alien business. He only knows that he won't let Shiro do this alone.

Keith just knows that he will follow Shiro to his death if he has to.

Shiro looks solemn now, and nods. "Of course. I was always yours."

 

 

Apparently, Shiro wasn't even supposed to tell Keith anything, so the Generals that were waiting for him in the streets aren't happy when Shiro comes back with Keith in tow.

They are even less happy when Keith tells them he's going to go with Shiro and there's nothing they can do about it. They talk about risks, about putting a civilian in danger, so Keith signs the enrolment papers on the condition that he will serve with Shiro.

In the end, it's Shiro who resolves the situation when he says that he will refuse to fight if Keith isn't at his side. It's decided pretty quickly after that.

They let them train for months, and there Keith sees what it means to have a super soldier fighting on your side: Shiro is stronger, faster, smarter than anyone Keith has ever seen.

He defeats records that Keith didn't even know existed, and he does it with an ease that leaves everyone out of breath. Keith also notices the looks of fearsome people shoot at Shiro when they think he's not looking. Shiro is needed but feared. What will they do to him if they manage to survive this war?

Keith looks at his own hands and wonders what he can do to stop this.

He doesn't know, but he's ready to do whatever he can.

 

 

At the end of their training, they give them their uniforms. For Shiro a dark silver suit with the logo for the Paladin Project in black on his chest, and for Keith a completely black suit with his symbol in red.

Their code names are Black and Red Paladin and they are the first line of defense from the alien invasion Ulaz has warned them about.

Sometimes it's still difficult to accept that they are in what can be considered a full alien invasion, even for Keith that has seen enough strange things lately to last him a lifetime.

From what Ulaz had explained the Galra, an incredibly advanced alien race, had come to earth aided by an Altean to research Earth and find a way to coexist with humans after the destruction of their own home planet Daibazaal.

It had been a mission of peace first and foremost, and a scouting party more than anything else. Ulaz hadn't been able to explain what had happened exactly, how the King and the Altean advisor had changed so much. What he knew was that they had both lost their mind and had become hungry for power. They had lost the support of the Alteans and had aligned themselves with the Germans, thanks to the Altean's ability to shapeshift.

Honnerva, the name of the Altean advisor, was the one at the front of the organization, while Zarkon, the king, and the other Galra wore masks to hide their faces.

What Keith has understood of all this is that a crazy group of aliens, regardless of original motive, is now threatening to destroy them. It's enough.

What Ulaz had managed to say, before dying, was also the location of a secret camp where a group of rebels was taken captive. Galra who had opposed the change of goals of their expedition and had, for this exact reason, been sent to jail.

The first mission Keith and Shiro have is to save them and try to gather as much information as possible to finally have some clues on what's going on.

It sounds impossible, a tale worthy of some of those strange scientific books Shiro likes so much. But a man as strong as ten humans had sounded just as ridiculous to Keith, and yet Shiro exists.

He wonders how many impossible things exist in this word.

The camp is in the middle of a forest deep into European territory and the military leaves them about one day worth of travel south of there so that they can maintain some element of surprise.

"This is not how I had imagined us leaving New York," Shiro tells him, with a little smirk.

Keith remembers their talks, dreams of vacations they could never afford, of traveling to the other ends of the earth and back. "Maybe not, but at least we actually did leave it," Keith tries, looking around.

Shiro nods and then smiles again taking Keith's hand in his and walking. "Yeah, it has his perks."

Keith looks surprised for a second before shaking his head. "You do realize we're on a difficult mission that could cost us our lives?"

"We still have five hours before arriving," Shiro reminds him, caressing Keith's hand, "and there's no one else here."

Keith wants to be annoyed, but at the same time, he can't do anything but smile. They haven't been able to do anything stuck in training. Everything had been too risky; a false step could have lead to someone discovering them and their relationship and it’s something they can’t risk.

This feels like the first time, since they have left their home, where they are really and truly alone, and if Keith has to be honest he needs to be reminded of why this is worth it. Why he's doing all this.

He tightens his hold on Shiro's hand and the other smiles at him.

"You always run so hot," Shiro says, with such warmth in his voice. It almost feels like when they were in their bed, back in New York. Keith longs for those days.

"I have to. You're always cold," he reminds him and Shiro laughs.

"I'm normal. You're the strange one. It's freezing here," Shiro reminds him, his breath condensing right in front of his face, proving his point.

"I can take my hand back, if you want," Keith teases, looking at the moment of panic that crosses the other's face. They both know he won't, but it's nice to know that Shiro still fears it a little.

The moment of hilarity vanishes quickly and they keep walking in silence for almost ten minutes before Shiro talks again.

"If something happens. I want you to stay behind me," he says, with the tone of someone ready to fight for this.

Good, Shiro still knows him well.

"What makes you think I'm going to stay behind you? I can fight," Keith says, a little angry and a little offended.

"I'm a super soldier, Keith. I can take anything they can throw at me. You're..." he stops, but he doesn't need to.

"Vulnerable? I trained the same as you and I've had more experiences than you getting kicked when I was little. I can fight, Shiro," he reminds him, "I have my gun. And if that isn't enough I have my knife."

Shiro nods, trying to appease him, "I know. But I am stronger. I... I'm not going to win this one, aren't I?"

"You should have thought about this before you signed us up for this," Keith tells him. He realizes immediately that it’s a low blow, but even after a month it still stings a little. He sees the way Shiro tenses, the way his eyes lose the subtle shine they have when Shiro is happy.

"You didn't have to come. I..." he says, but Keith stops him immediately.

"I go where you go. And that's final."

They don't say anything anymore.

 

 

Silence works in a strange way, it stretches and seems to take control of everything it touches. The longer it goes on, it becomes scarier.

Keith knows he should say something, after all, he hadn't meant to be that harsh with Shiro, but he finds himself unable to. He knows that he still harbors some anger over Shiro's unilateral decision, but he had also decided to try and leave everything behind them.

Keith doesn't regret the decision of following Shiro to war, and it had been _his_ decision. Shiro had chosen for himself, but Keith had followed him all on his own.

They don't say much, marching forward the point in the forest where the facility should be. He remembers most of the intel, and he wonders if they will be able to find anyone. Ulaz's intel had been old, after all.

Still, they don't have a choice but to continue.

They don't have any other clues to help them. If this doesn't work out, they will be completely in the dark. So they keep walking, determinately looking forward and avoiding each other's eyes as much as possible.

This isn't what Keith wanted for their first real mission. As much as he believes they are ready, he knows that war has a way of breaking even the most qualified. In the face of what they will have to face now, he doesn't want to approach this angry at Shiro.

And yet, he can’t think of anything to say. Not an apology, not a way for them to move past this. His brain feels frozen.

They don't talk for almost the entire walk and the silence grows between them, so much that Keith swears it is a physical presence walking beside them.

When they must be not even half an hour from the facility, Shiro reaches forward and takes Keith's arm and stopping him. "Wait," he says, looking at him, "Not like this."

Hearing his own thought from Shiro's mouth makes Keith relax minutely. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that..."

"It was true," Shiro replies immediately, shrugging, "I know I fucked up, believe it or not. But I also believe this was the right choice. Whatever happens... I'm just sorry I dragged you into it."

Keith hesitates for a second before shaking his head. "I was involved since the beginning, idiot. I care about you. Hell, Shiro, I love you. You didn't drag me anywhere, I'm a big boy and I can make my own decisions."

Shiro doesn't say anything for a second before smiling a little sadly. "But you’re still angry," it's obvious it takes a lot out of him, that the knowledge hurts him in some way. Keith can't really say he's wrong.

"I won’t be forever," he says immediately, instead, because it's something that he can promise. "Even now, I wasn't really angry about this. But I won't be treated like I'm weak, Shiro. We go together in this, as partners."

The other looks at him for a second before closing his eyes. "I just... I don't want anything to happen to you."

"Well, that makes two of us. I want us to actually make it out of this war. I want to buy another house, with a single room, and don't have to go on stupid fake dates," Keith says, with a little smile at the end, "and I'm going to fight for that, Takashi."

"I'm going to bring you out on a proper date," Shiro promises, with a smile. "Something cheesy and over the top."

"You want us to get beaten in an alley?" Keith answers immediately, but he knows he's smiling, a warm feeling spreading inside his body.

"As I recall, you got beaten up anyway," Shiro jokes and Keith laughs, unable to resist.

"So I only have to win a war to have an actual date," Keith says in the end, smiling a little, "you're hard work."

"I'm worth it," the other replies immediately. Shiro's fingers caress Keith's arm before releasing it. "We do this together."

Keith nods, missing the feeling of the other's touch immediately.

They start walking again, but with a renewed focus. Now that they have fixed the situation between them, the mission takes top priority.

Keith doesn't know how this will go, but he likes to believe that with Shiro by his side, they can really make it.

 

 

They find the compound exactly where Ulaz had told them, but they don't have much time to map the guard's routes. Ulaz had told them about a cavern on the right side of the facility where, apparently, the prisoners are held so they hurry in that direction.

They try to arrive them as stealthy as possible, but they find themselves forced to kill two guards in orders to remain undetected. It's not pleasant, and Keith doesn't relish the thought that they are gone, even if they are the enemy.

He sees the exact same sentiment reflected in Shiro's eyes and takes strength from that.

The cavern isn't as far away as they had feared, and they reach it quickly. They fight off two soldiers that were guarding the entrance and race inside.

Deeper in the cavern they find some prison cells built inside the mountain's wall. On the other side of the bars there are people amassed on the walls—well, _aliens_ to be more exact.

They look strangely different from what Keith had expected, but he hadn't been able to see Ulaz before his death. Honestly, some of them resemble some kinds of reptilian creature, while others look come like cats.

The prisoners immediately notice their entrance and look up to them, curious. They look tired and malnourished. Keith wonders if they have been tortured all this time.

"Uhm," Shiro tries, looking around, "is there a Kolivan here?"

Kolivan, from what Ulaz had said, was the leader of the resistance faction and their best bet at forming some kind of cooperation with these aliens.

For a second no one moves and Keith is afraid they are too late or, worse, they don't even have the right place. What could they say to their superiors if this mission fails?

When a figure rises up, Keith relaxes a little. "I am Kolivan," the alien says, "who is asking?"

He looks angry and distrustful but mostly, he looks tired and beaten, even more than the others.

"I'm Takashi Shirogane," Shiro says, pointing to himself, "I was sent here by Ulaz to save you."

Apparently, the name _Ulaz_ must be of some importance to the prisoners, because out of the blue Keith sees all of them moving and excitedly looking at Kolivan.

"Ulaz, you say," Kolivan replies, still mistrusting. "Who assures me—" the alien starts to say, but Keith doesn't think they have enough time to sort this out.

"Look, the choice is staying here, which I don't think is very pleasant," Keith interrupts him, "or coming with us. Do what you want, but we won't ask again."

Shiro doesn't say anything, standing behind him in an act of support.

It takes a minute, a minute where Keith thinks he might have fucked up the whole mission, before Kolivan nods. "Right. We'll follow you, but we have to stop what they are doing in the compound."

Both Shiro and Keith stop, a little surprised.

"This is supposed to be an extract mission," Shiro says, hesitantly, "we don't have the resources for a frontal assault."

"Yes, you do," Kolivan replies, motioning for the rest of the prisoners to stand up, "You have the force of the Blades." Keith looks at Shiro because, in theory, Shiro is the leader of this mission. It seems a risk too great to take.

"Why?" Shiro asks, looking briefly at Keith. Keith notices that he's worried, even if he's trying to appear confident. He wants to reach out, but he knows he can't. "If you want us to change our mission, you have to give us a good reason."

Kolivan nods, finding truth in Shiro's statement. "I do not have time to explain everything to you, but this is one of the facilities where they are harvesting Quintessence to build their weapon. We'll explain everything once we're out of here, but if we don't stop them..."

He leaves the sentence open, but both Shiro and Keith understand what he's implying. It seems that they don't have another choice.

So Shiro nods and they start freeing everyone from their cells. Trying to see if someone was too hurt to fight.

"No one is going to back down from this fight," Kolivan told them, almost as if their worry was an offense.

"We don't want victims," Shiro tries to explain, but Kolivan shakes his head, looking at his man.

"We're ready to lay down our lives for the cause," he explains, "we're all going to fight." And as much as they ask, they find no one that wants to stay behind.

Keith wonders why they are so decisive. This isn't even their planet, and they are putting everything on the line for this.

He looks at Shiro, looking at them with an impressed stare, and he thinks that they are a lot like Shiro in some ways. Keith is different, however, his sacrifices and his efforts have always been devoted to something in particular, not just spread over anything.

"I guess we're doing this thing," Keith says, touching the knife attached to his belt.

Shiro looks at him and nods, grim. "I don't think we have another choice."

 

 

They sneak into the compound as quiet as they can be. It's obvious that the Blades are professionals and used to sneak around and move without making sounds. They feet touch the ground as light as feathers and even if there are more of them than Shiro and Keith, they know that it would be easier to spot any of them than all the blades put together.

It's also impressive to see how well they know each other, how in sync they are, that just a look or a nod from Kolivan sends them in different directions, reacting to the orders quickly.

Most of the Blades will position themselves in strategic places to attack, where most of the guards are concentrated and where it will be easier to attack and take them down. Their objective is to reach the main mining area and destroy the machine.

It won't be easy, but it seems like Kolivan and the others know the place like the back of their hands. They know the best route, how to avoid being spotted and where to hide when a guard passes them by.

When he and Shiro had tried to research this facility on their preparation for this mission, they had found almost nothing, the Galra's intelligence locked under strict security. It is incredible how easier this is with inside information.

They manage to arrive at the mining room almost without incidents, and what they see it's too confusing for them to understand. There is a hole in the ground, big enough for what seems like a gigantic drill to dig through, however, the machine isn't moving, but something keeps being absorbed into it.

They don't have time to ask, because Kolivan motions for them to reach something a little bit more high ground, and they obey. It's obvious that Kolivan knows more than them how to act in this situation, and they quickly decide to leave him the reins of this mission.

Shiro looks back at Keith, and for a moment they just look at each other. They know that soon this will be an active battlefield, the first one they’ll see, but not the last. For a moment, they just want to look at each other, find comfort in the knowledge that, at least, they are together in this.

It's a fleeting moment, but one that helps Keith finally center himself and prepare his heart for what will be happening soon.

Then Kolivan nods, and the attack begins. Shiro and Keith focus their fire on the machine, hoping to break some vital part and let it fall to his doom, while the Blades attack the Galra soldiers that are keeping watch. For a while, the situation seems handled, so much so that Shiro's and Keith's bullets seem to be actually making a dent in the machine when one of the soldiers spots them and runs to them. Shiro notices before Keith does, and he grits his teeth, trying to shoot at the alien while he runs towards them. It's obvious that it doesn't work, that they have some kind of barrier - probably some alien tech. The alien soldier, however, seems to be weaponless, from what Keith can see from the corner of his eye.

"Keep shooting," Shiro tells him, and as much as Keith wants to help Shiro take care of the alien, he knows that he would be useless. Bullets don't seem to be affecting them and, in a physical contest, he's no match for the Galra. Destroying their machine and fucking with their plans? That, however, he can do.

So he keeps shooting at the same spot, while he hears grunts on his left. It seems, from the sounds, that Shiro has the upper hand, but he can't be sure. He wants to look, a part of him worried about Shiro, but he can't.

Maybe, if he had taken a look, he would have seen the body of the alien crashing against his. Instead, he only got a panicked: "Keith! Dodge!" from Shiro and then a body collided with his. The impact of the hit makes Keith lose his balance and for a moment he holds his breath, tries to push back with everything he has, but he soon loses the battle against gravity and he feels his body fall over the edge, his own gun still firmly clutched in his hand.

Keith hears Shiro scream, and he wants to spin in the air, see what's happening, but he's plummeting, too fast to actually control his own body. He falls into the hole, miraculously avoiding the large drill, and he sees the purple sparkle of light that the machine had been collecting: Quintessence, from what they understand.

Keith doesn't know how deep this hole is, how long he has before he dies, but he closes his eyes and thinks of Shiro. Who will be left alone, who will be taken advantage of. Who will never forgive himself.

Keith doesn't want to die. He wants to have that date Shiro promised him. He wants to take Shiro outside and actually hold his hand. Keith wants a life with Shiro.

He feels energy pulse into his body, emanating from something inside him; a burning force that he never knew was there, a pressure that he needs to release.

Keith opens his eyes and pushes it all out.

He skyrockets out of the hole, feeling the wind against his skin, but he feels hot. Hotter than he can understand. There is something propelling him up, and soon Keith realizes he has flown out of the hole.

Keith blinks, the knowledge that he's safe is slow to come. He looks down at himself, uncomprehending. The moment he does and realizes that he's completely engulfed in flames, he loses the balance and crashes onto the ground, right beside a fight between a Galra and a member of the Blades.

Keith pants, trying to understand how he can be on fire and yet feel nothing at all. He's a little warmer than usual, but he doesn't feel his own skin burning, he doesn't feel pain. It appears that being completely made of flames isn’t really hurting him.

Near him he sees the Blade member take a hit and go down, and he reacts without thinking. He gets up and punches the Galra with his flaming fist. The alien screams and goes down, holding his own face. The smell of the sizzling skin and fur is sickening.

It seems that his fire does indeed burn everyone but himself. He looks up, seeing that Shiro is now fighting three Galra at the same time, and having a hard time of it. He has been able to fly out of the hole, he's sure he can fly up there now... if he only figures out _how_.

It should work just like a plane would, he thinks to himself, he just needs to make his flames extend downward and use that as a propeller. It sounds easy in his head, but he has no idea how to control it. While he was falling he had let his instincts direct him, and he hadn't really concentrated on how.

But he needs to save Shiro, anything else isn’t as important. He squares his feet and jumps, at the same time _pushing_ that pressure inside of him down. He hopes this fucking works.

Strangely enough, it does.

Keith flies, just as a rocket would, towards Shiro and has the time to yell, "Incoming!" before he barrels into one of the aliens who had been in the process of punching Shiro from behind. They crash onto the walkway and Keith tones out the alien's scream, looking back towards the other two aliens. One of them is still fighting Shiro, but the other seems to be transfixed on Keith.

He gets why.

Still, he has no time to waste, and whatever is happening to him, saving Shiro is more important. He extends one of his hand and lets the flame converge there before pushing. He sends a ball of fire towards the enemy, and the alien screams while he gets pushed over the railing, just as Keith had been minutes before.

By the time he looks back, Shiro has taken care of the other alien and he's now looking at Keith. He looks transfixed, and for a second Keith wonders what he must look like, completely surrounded by flames. Does Shiro even realize it's him?

"Keith?" Shiro asks, a little out of breath and Keith can only nod in response.

It seems like the other is still unsure, looking at him like he's trying to see something he recognizes, but he must find it quickly because the next moment Shiro is running towards him. Keith wants to hug him, to kiss him, but when he extends his arm to do so, he sees the flames, still burning, and he panics. "Wait! Shiro, stop!" Thankfully Shiro halts, surprised and Keith relaxes. "I... I burn people. You'll be burned." He doesn't know how to make it stop, how did it even start in the first place, and Shiro looks at him, hesitating.

"I'm more resistant than most," Shiro says, taking another step, enough that the burning sensation of Keith's skin must be starting to affect him, "I can take some fire."

"No!" what is Shiro even saying? just because he has tougher skin, it doesn't mean he's fireproof. The alien serum doesn't make him invincible, "I won't hurt you! But I don't know how to make it stop!"

He's panicking, he realizes that, and it seems that the fire around him is only getting stronger. Whatever this power is, it grows with his panic, with his anger, becoming warmer, consuming him. Even the air around him gets increasingly hotter. He's sure that the alien's body beside him is now completely burnt.

Shiro seems to understand and he raises his hands in a placating gesture, "Calm down, Keith. I'm not coming closer."

Shiro’s voice pierces through the cloud of anxiety and Keith nods, feeling a little less anxious. Whatever happens, he shouldn't be able to hurt Shiro now, and that's what is important.

"I think the flames are reacting to your mood," it makes sense, really, with the way they had come alive in his state of panic. "So try and calm down. The battle is over, Keith. We're safe."

"You're not even wondering how I got flames all around my body? Maybe I'm stuck this way, maybe I'll never return to being me." Keith looks down at himself, at the flames that engulf his hands. He can see their shapes, under the orange of the fire, and he can move them, feel his fingers, but that doesn't mean anything.

"I thought you were _dead_ ," Shiro says after a moment and his voice break at the last word. All the anguish he had felt, all the fears, coming aline in that last breath.

Keith looks at him, at the raw emotion in his eyes. The devotion, the love, that Keith never takes for granted. He _should_ be dead.

Shiro takes another step forward, "If this is how you'll be from now on, I'll take it, as long as you're alive."

It sounds cheesy and impractical. Keith is a man made of fire, what kind of future could he have? Maybe he's burning from the inside in this very moment. Maybe he's already dead.

And yet, the knowledge that Shiro would still take him like this—the soft look on Shiro’s face while he looks at him—makes Keith feel loved and safe. He closes his eyes, and lets go of the last of his fears. Whatever will happen, Shiro is safe. That is everything Keith cares about.

Shiro's sharp intake of breath surprised mixed with delight, makes Keith reopen his eyes, curious. "There you are," Shiro murmurs.

Keith blinks and looks back down at himself. There are no flames anymore, only his skin, completely human. And when he says his skin, he means only that, his suit must have burned in the fire.

He's still human. Still him.

Shiro finally reaches forward, hugging him and bringing him closer to him. Keith closes his eyes at the feeling of the other pressed against him and holds him back.

"Everything will be alright, you'll be okay. We'll figure out what happened to you. I won't let them do anything to you," Shiro's stream of reassurance is comforting, and Keith lets himself sag against him. Let the super soldier hold all his weight.

The noises from the battle fade around them and Keith can hear the Blades cheer. They have won.

 

 

They find a way to cover up Keith, and while Shiro sends the signal to the base to come and pick them up, Kolivan approaches him, looking at him strangely.

He doesn't say anything for a few seconds, simply standing beside Keith. Kolivan is stiff, his back straightened, there is nothing comfortable or welcoming in his stance.

Keith doesn't know what Kolivan wants to ask him, and frankly, he doesn't care.

"Do you know how it's possible that I burst into flame?" he asks the alien, looking at his own hands. "I couldn't before I fell into that hole, and I think it might be related to the Quintessence."

Kolivan nods, looking pensive. He's gathering his thoughts, it seems, trying to see how to best explain something delicate. "The reason why our leaders chose this planet as our first colony is that this is not our first time visiting Earth. It is said that this was one of the first planets we visited when we first started exploring the universe," he talks like it's ancient history to him, no more than a myth. "The quintessence, in small quantities, has peculiar effects on Galra. We can receive powers, just like you did."

Keith nods, thinking. "So it works the same with humans?"

"From what I've seen, no. It usually kills them instantly." Keith looks up, startled at the revelation. What does that mean, what is Kolivan trying to tell him? "But, as I told you, we long thought there could be humans, here on earth, who had some Galra genetic, a remnant of our first arrival here," Kolivan hurries to explain, and Keith can't believe it.

"You're telling me I'm an _alien_ ," he repeats, because the entire thing seems incredible to his own ears. Kolivan just shrugs, looking at him.

"I'm telling you, you might have had an ancestor who was, for you, an alien," he rectifies. Kolivan looks uncomfortable like he doesn't know what he's doing. Keith thinks: _join the fucking club_.

He doesn't know how to accept this fact, that he's not completely human. That there is a part of him, the one that apparently bursts into flames, that is not of this planet.

Well shit.

Kolivan seems to understand that their conversation is now over, that Keith is too focused on himself and this new revelation to actually talk, and he slinks away, back to his comrades. Keith doesn't even look up to watch him leave.

No more than five more minutes pass before Shiro comes back, and by then Keith is so agitated that he feels the tips of his fingers starting to burn. He might lose control soon and burn this set of clothes too.

"They say it will be a couple of hours, but that we shouldn't move," Shiro explains, coming back, "I told them that they should hurry because some of the Blades don't look so good and..." his chatter comes to an alt. Keith wonders how he must look, what kind of face he has.

One second later Shiro's face enters his line of vision and he realizes Shiro has bent down on the dirt in front of him. "What's going on?"

Keith doesn't know how to explain it to him. What can he even say? "I'm not human, apparently."

Shiro blinks, a little surprised, and then looks towards the Blades. "You don't look like them either." It's the calmest approach to the situation he could have thought of, and he almost laughs in Shiro's face.

"Apparently I have some alien genetics in me. It's the reason why I can now..." he mimics an explosion that hopefully mimics the way he bursts into flame on command. Shiro nods, accepting this like Keith just told him he has a crazy grandmother. "Why are you not freaked out by this?"

Shiro smiles a second later, a soft expression. "I can lift that tank over there without too many problems," he informs Keith, "and I can go toe to toe with any of these guys. Because an alien used his own DNA to create a serum and injected me with it," he stops, allows Keith to digest the situation and understand, "It would be a little hypocritical of me to care if you're part alien."

Keith hadn't really thought about that, too focused on his own internal panic. He looks up at Shiro, the eyes that have accompanied Keith in all his years of peace, and for the second time today, he starts to relax. Shiro always brings out the best in him.

"So we match," he smiles at the idea, and Shiro responds in kind.

"You just didn't like the fact that I called you weak, admit it," the other jokes and Keith laughs, unable to resist. Honestly? It would be something he would do.

Shiro looks at him for a second and then he looks around them. Keith does the same and he sees that none of the others are paying attention to them, all too busy taking care of their wounded or talking between each other. It's like they are alone now.

Shiro smiles at him then and pushes forward, kissing him quickly on the mouth. It's not what Keith wants, not by a long shot, but it's more than they had in a long time. He licks his own lips and enjoys the way Shiro's eyes follow the movement.

He might not be sure about this whole alien thing, but he thinks that, with Shiro by his side, he can overcome it one way or another.

He _has_ to.

There is a war to be won.

 

 

When the base camp comes to extract them, they are too many to be carried by plane, but there are tanks and machines left there by the Galra. Most of the blades are able to pilot them, so Shiro and Keith remain with some of the Galra to guide them, while Kolivan returns with the plane.

It takes a little bit more time by land, but Keith is grateful for the opportunity to rest. Since they are stored into the back of a tank, no one is here to look at him and Shiro basically cuddling. It's not a bad way to spend the next ten hours.

All in all, when they return back to the camp, Kolivan has already started reporting what he knows to their superiors. General Iverson is looking pretty interested by the time Shiro and Keith join the conversation.

"Good job out there," Iverson tells them, with a nod and an approving look, "we have now a deeper understanding of what our enemy wants to do than what Ulaz told us. And we have an army of people who can actually keep up with them."

Keith looks at Kolivan, trying to see how he feels at being called an _army_ , but the alien seems stoic as always, apparently uncaring of the way they are already being cataloged.

"Their plan," Kolivan reveals for their benefit, "is to create a condensed Quintessence, as pure as it gets. Unfortunately, the one that they are able to extract now from the core of your planet is not as pure as they would like. It seems that by the time that our leader Zarkon and his wife, Honnerva, had arrived on this planet, the quintessence had already corrupted them."

"What do you mean?" Shiro wonders, looking confused. "How can Quintessence corrupts?"

"Quintessence is the prime form of fuel we used on our planet. It powered up everything we did, but in small doses, it was also used as a medicine. It appears however that prolonged exposure to Quintessence will slowly corrupt the user. A drug, if you will. We hadn't noticed."

"Then why aren't you all corrupted? Why just them?" Keith wonders out loud, confused, and Kolivan's hard stare focuses on him.

"Not all Galra believe in the use of Quintessence in every branch of science. The reason for our planet's destruction, after all, is out overuse of it," Kolivan is harsh in his description of his people, but Keith can see a trace of sadness in his eyes. He can't even imagine what he would feel like if he was forced to see Earth collapse slowly upon itself.

"But we can assume that Zarkon and his wife are corrupted. As well as some of their soldiers," Shiro intervenes and Kolivan nods in reply. "From what I understand, the Quintessence also allows them to be stronger than others. Faster. More dangerous."

No one says anything for a moment. They are at a disadvantage in this fight, it's obvious, but at the same time, it's not a fight they can lose.

"Honnerva," Kolivan continues after a moment, “is creating a machine, the Komar, to extract a large quantity of Quintessence all at once, in order to create a single pure cube of Quintessence. With it, they would have unlimited power."

Iverson seems to think about it for a second. "Do we know where they are building this weapon?" Kolivan shakes his head and it's not really surprising. "Then our first order of business is to find this damn machine and take it out."

Iverson's order reverberates in the tent before he turns to look directly at Keith. "Also, I hear you have some new powers." Immediately, Keith sees Shiro tense up, and he morphs into almost a battle stance. It's endearing to see, in a way. Iverson simply raises one eyebrow, not really that impressed. "We can use that," he quickly says, "we need all the help we can get. I don't care why you got them, we accepted and created our golden boy here, we're glad to have another."

Keith knows it's not as easy as that. They need them now, when the battle is fierce and there is no chance for them to actually win without them, but he wonders what will happen once they are not needed anymore.

Still, there is nothing to be done about it at the moment. So Keith nods, and Shiro relaxes marginally.

"You two will join with the Blades of Marmora and you will stop them. The fate of the world depends on you."

 

 

After that, their missions become more complex in nature and difficulty. Keith learns to control his new powers, and he learns to appreciate them. The Blades share with them a way to create a suit that doesn't burn every time he uses his flames and gradually it becomes easier to control them.

After a while, the flames become another part of him, and he learns to master them like one would a sword. Together with the others they manage to conquer compound after compound and stall the plans of the invading aliens.

It's not as easy as it sounds, and they've had too many close calls for Keith's liking, but they make it. And every time it feels a little bit closer to the end.

More than a year passes before they finally find the information they need. They find a map with the location of all the Galra's facilities in one of the larger compounds they attack. It’s easier from there to pinpoint the location of where the machine will be.

They have spent too much time working towards it, and every day more they don’t stop them, is a day towards their defeat in this war. There is a strong possibility that Zarkon and his wife will be there. That this will be their last mission before the end.

Iverson allows them one night of freedom before leaving and since most of the Blades can't enter the cities, they decide to camp outside and relax. Shiro and Keith join them, having spent more than a year fighting alongside them.

They don't need a comfy bed, or to go to a bar. Sitting around the fire with a bunch of aliens sums up their experience of the war pretty nicely if Keith is being honest with himself.

At one point it's just the two of them around the fire, looking up at the stars. They haven't said anything in a while, and Keith is starting to appreciate the silence.

"Everything will change tomorrow," Shiro says, his tone low and warm.

"It could be for the better," Keith tries, but he knows what Shiro means. Even if they win tomorrow, and Keith has to believe that they will, what will happen to them once this war it's over? What will the government do with them?

"I know this is not a picnic," Shiro says, "or a night out in the city, but I..." he stops, and finally he looks down, meeting Keith's own gaze. They stop, looking into each other's eyes for a moment that feels like centuries and then, then Shiro raises his hand and puts it on Keith's cheek.

The others, while not there with them, can see them if they turn around, and it's such a stupid risk to take at this point of their fight. But Keith just melts against the other's touch, uncaring. They don't really know what the Blades think of their relationship if they have figured it out, if in space there is the same prejudice that lives around earth—it had always been easier to hide with them too.

And yet, now, Shiro's thumb is caressing his cheek, with a care and love that Keith feels deep inside him, burning even more than his own flames. It's not a picnic in Central Park, or a night out in the city, but Keith understands the intent, and it's everything he ever wanted.

"I love you," he says, enjoying the happy smile on Shiro's face. Their life has never been easy, but he's glad he got to enjoy this with Shiro. He's glad he got to live this with him.

Whatever the hardship, whatever the prejudices. Keith is happy at this moment.

"I love you too," Shiro replies and the next moment they are kissing. Kissing like they used to do in the privacy of their own home, like there is no one around them and, for once, no reason to hide.

It's a life they will never be able to live, a freedom they will never be able to obtain, but it feels intoxicating now and Keith allows himself a moment to enjoy it and not think about anything else. Their responsibilities, their fears, pale in comparison to the feeling of love Keith feels in his chest.

He cups Shiro's cheeks as well, caresses the hair at the base of his neck, and he commits this to memory. Whatever will happen to them they'll have this. This one single moment in time.

They separate after a while, but they stand there, their forehead touching, their breaths mixing with each other.

Keith sees a movement in the corner of his eyes and he spots Kolivan, watching them from far away. When their gaze lock, the other simply nods and walks away.

"They don't care," Keith says, under his breath, and Shiro just caresses his cheek again with his thumb.

" _I_ don't care," Shiro informs him with a little smile, and Keith just melts. Yeah. This is everything he ever wanted.

After a few seconds, Shiro starts to push back, but Keith holds on to him. "Wait, one last thing," he says, and he searches with one hand for his dagger. He takes it and holds it for Shiro to take. "I want you to have this, tomorrow. I don't really need it."

"It's your dagger," Shiro says, a little out of breath, "it was your mother's, you never..."

"Shiro," he interrupts him gently, "I literally burst into flames. I can't use this, but you don't have much but your pistol and your fists. It's just a dagger, but if it can help you? Then I want you to have it."

Shiro looks at the blade for a second before he whispers, a little hoarsely, "but this is the thing you love the most."

Keith almost laughs at that. "If you really think that, you haven't been paying a lot of attention, Takashi."

Shiro looks up at him, surprised for a second, and then he smiles, holding the dagger close to his heart.

"I will keep it safe," he promises and Keith shakes his head.

"Keep yourself safe, that's what I care about."

 

 

The next day, they strike at dusk. The idea is to infiltrate the last base with the aid of the night and take care of as many guards as possible before they can alert everyone else of the attack. It will be a mission of stealth above anything else. They are probably going to be outnumbered, the elite of Zarkon’s army will be protecting the place, and they can’t afford to be reckless or dumb.

When they study the place, during the hours before they are allowed to strike, it becomes more and more clear that this is the only place where the Komar could be hidden. The entire base is built on a mountain, overlooking a large amount of land. From what Kolivan has explained to them about Quintessence and the way to gather it, it is the best place to activate the Komar experiment.

It’s clear it will be a tough mission, but the promise of freedom at the end of it, to maybe see the end of this tunnel, makes them focused and a little giddy. Keith looks into Shiro’s eyes and hopes that he can convey everything he needs to with just a look. He can’t say that he loves him, and the feeling burns inside him.

The words they shared the night before still warm his heart, and he would give anything to just reach and take Shiro’s face in his hands. Take another moment of comfort just for themselves.

Kolivan knows, and he doesn’t seem to care, but it would still feel like crossing a line he’s not sure he’s ready to.

Shiro must read his expression, must understand Keith’s desire just by his gaze, and he smiles. He looks a little sad, but Keith tries to draw strength from it. This is why they are fighting, to go back home _together_.

The mission starts with a nod from Shiro. Even if the Blades are their own team, with Kolivan at the head, they have been following Shiro into battle readily. Keith wonders if Ulaz had predicted that when he had picked Shiro for his experiment.

They climb the side of the mountain, there where their defense is weaker, and they stealth their way inside the facility. Although no one of them has ever been inside, they have some knowledge about the layout of the base, and their standard security measures. But even their intel isn’t perfect without hands-on experience. They have built this mission too quickly, haven’t researched enough.

Even if they manage to sneak in and surpass most of the external guards without being noticed, they set off an alarm just two doors in, entering a big holding room where most of their Quintessence is being stored. It takes only a few seconds for the room to be invaded by soldiers.

Galra flow inside the room like a wave, and in a second their world becomes chaos and destruction. Keith activates his flame the moment the alarm starts, and he flies into the air, sending fire to the first wave of enemies. He hopes to maybe lighten the load of the others, but there are too many of them.

Minutes into the fight he has lost sight of both Shiro and Kolivan. In the chaos, it had been impossible to keep an eye on them, but every moment where he can’t fight at Shiro’s side, his worry only grows and with it the desperation of his attacks.

Keith burns an alien right in front of him and flies up, looking around frantically. He spots Shiro, fighting three aliens at the same time, winning from the looks of it, quite easily. He still flies to him, landing right at his back. If they are close to each other, Keith can keep Shiro safe.

"These ones are just a distraction," Shiro screams, while he takes one alien by the cuff of his shirt and throws him to the other side of the room. "We need to find Zarkon and Honnerva," he punches another alien, cutting what he was going to say, and Keith launches a fireball in the direction of two Galra, taking them out.

"We need to find Kolivan first," Keith reasons, "he'll know where to go."

"You're the one that can fly!" Shiro reasons, looking at him, "find him." Keith hesitates and Shiro just scowls at him. "I'll be fine, I can take care of myself. Supersoldier, remember?" his smile is a little cocky and he just turns around again and kicks a Galra in the shin, taking the momentum to kick him again and throw him across the room. _Show off_.

Keith knows Shiro can take care of himself, knows his powers better than most, but he still worries. It’s in his nature, he thinks. At the same time, everything that these years in the battlefield have taught him is that the mission needs to be a priority sometimes.

He needs to trust Shiro to know his limits and do what has to be done. He nods in Shiro’s direction and flies away, trying to find the leader of the Blades. He spots him after a few seconds and he hurries in that direction.

Kolivan is on the other side of the room, surrounded, and he looks like he could use the help. So he lands beside him and burns the face of one of the Galra soldier, his screams echoing even amidst the chaos.

Kolivan nods at him in gratitude while he takes care of the other Galra. "Kolivan! We need to go and find Zarkon and Honnerva," Keith screams, sending a stream of fire towards a group of Galra, "this is just a distraction."

Kolian nods, and he looks determined in a way Keith had never seen before. He’s killing his own people, Keith reminds himself, his blows aren’t even hesitating. Kolivan and all the blades are fighting a war that is not theirs, and yet they are doing it with no complaints. "You’re right. Join me at the top of the stairs! They should be going up in the mountain if they want to achieve their goal. The blades will keep control of the situation here. Take Shiro, we can use his help."

Keith doesn’t even nod in his direction before he flies off, he reaches Shiro once again, finding him engaged in battle with another three Galra. He swoops in, helping him kill them and then he catches Shiro’s attention. They don’t even talk, but the other understands that he needs to follow Keith, and they sprint towards the meeting point.

Keith arrives there first, and while he waits for the others, he looks down, at the chaos of battle. At all the people that are losing their lives over this.

Looking at them like this it’s almost impossible to separate the Blades from the Galra soldiers. There is no way to describe this battle if not a massacre, and whatever the outcome, the number of lives lost will be far too high.

They have gone too far, they have done too much. There is no other choice but to win this war and put an end to all this misery. When Shiro and Kolivan reach him, they don’t even pause to look at the battle.

There is no more time to contemplate. This will be the end, in a way or another.

Kolivan runs like he knows exactly where he needs to go. “They’ll be at the top of the mountain, the only place where their machine can gather the quintessence they need.”

Most of the soldiers are fighting the other blades in the chaos they have just left, but some have been positioned along the road, probably as a last defense. They aren’t a match for Kolivan, a super soldier an a man completely engulfed by flames.

"Be careful,” Kolivan warns them, once they have almost reached the top, “both Zarkon and Honnerva are incredibly dangerous. They are stronger than the Galra you have faced until now. The quintessence had already started changing them when they caught me. I don’t know now what they have even become.” He looks back at them, with something heavy in his gaze, “Honnerva is an Altean, so we don’t know how the quintessence has affected her."

The news is a little shocking to Keith, who had never thought of the possibility. The Alteans are still a mystery to him, even if Kolivan had talked about them sporadically. "We don’t know what we’re going up against?"

"We know enough," Kolivan says, even if Keith disagrees, "the important thing is not to underestimate them!"

"We won't," Shiro promises before Keith can say anything. Keith looks back towards him, even if they are running towards one of their most dangerous fights. There is no hesitation in Shiro’s face, no hints of the fear that is gnawing at Keith’s stomach. Keith wants to believe that Shiro is completely certain that they are going to win, but he knows that Shiro has always been good at masking his own feelings.

Keith wants to reach him, to comfort him, but there is no time. They will have to win, and then this nightmare will be over.

They arrive quickly at the top of the mountain and the sight that awaits them it’s everything they ever feared. There is a machine, bigger than anything Keith had ever seen, and it looks like it has already been activated.

Purple particles, that by now Keith recognizes as raw Quintessence, are being sucked into the machine. It reminds Keith of the drill he fell into that first mission, the one that gave him his powers, only bigger. "That's the Komar!" Kolivan tells them, but Keith had already guessed.

Besides the machine, two figures stand tall, looking in their direction. Keith has never seen Zarkon before, only heard the tales of the Blades, but he pinpoints him immediately.

The Galra who turns in their direction, taller than anyone Keith has ever seen, looks imposing, towering over them. HIs eyes are unfocused, but there is a cruelty behind them. He’s dangerous, Keith can see it at first glance.

Beside him stands a woman, little compared to him, but her eyes shine in the same way his do. She smiles at the machine, and even if Zarkon looks strong, Keith shivers just looking at Honnerva. There is an aura around her that makes her look even more corrupt than Zarkon. There doesn’t seem to be even a shred of humanity—or the alien equivalent—left in her.

Zarkon rushes towards them the moment he sees them, and Kolivan screams "Keith, get to the machine, stop it, it's the only way."

Keith doesn’t want to leave them alone to fight, but he knows what would happen if they don’t stop him, if they allow them to complete their pure quintessence. Kolivan and Shiro will have to handle themselves. He flies over Zarkon’s head, evading a hit, and he hears a punch being landed.

He can’t look back, even if he wants to, and he tries to focus on his own battle. Honnerva notices him and she snarls in his direction. There are sparks flying in the hands, and Keith had to dodge at least two streams of pure energy she launches in his direction. He doesn’t shoot at her and focuses his fire on the machine.

Honnerva rages against him, snarling and protecting her little device of death like a lioness protects her cub. He grinds his teeth and swears. It doesn’t seem like she ever lets down her guard, and as much as he tries, there is no way to hit the machine. Then he decides to go for it. It’s obvious that fighting from a distance isn’t going to work, but he has an advantage she doesn’t have.

He’ made of fire, and fire _burns_.

Keith avoids another of her attacks, and flies in her direction, forcing her to take a step back or be burned by his mere presence. The moment she does, Keith turns and sends a burst of flame towards the Komar. The machine breaks under his fire and Keith smiles.

Honnerva screams, but at the same time he hears someone else say "No!". It sounds like Kolivan's voice and he looks back in time to see Shiro in Zarkon’s grasp, trying to free himself. Before Keith can even react, Zarkon tosses Shiro aside like he weighs nothing and Shiro body flies over the edge of the mountain, disappearing from Keith's view.

Panic swells inside him, an aborted scream leaving his lips, and he flies towards the cliff. Faster, faster. He doesn't know what he'll do, he can't catch Shiro in this form, but burning is better than falling dead on the ground, isn't it? Shiro’s regenerative factor can heal some burns, but a fall from this height?

Before he can actually reach the cliff and dive to find Shiro, something catches him. He turns, letting his flames run hotter and he sees Zarkon's hand wrapped around his legs, uncaring of the burns. He slams Keith into the ground, but Keith almost doesn’t even feel the pain.

He can only think of Shiro, and his body falling, unable to find something to break his descent. Keith can only think about Shiro’s lifeless body, alone at the base of the mountain and he screams. Loud and desperate.

He kicks at Zarkon’s hand, rages against his hold. Keith pushes his flames hotter than ever before, uncaring of anything. He needs to be free, he needs to follow Shiro and maybe, maybe he can still save him. Maybe there is something he can do. Or, at the very least, he can die beside him.

Zarkon’s hold is relentless, however, doesn’t matter how much Keith tries. Zarkon smiles while his hand gets burnt worse and worse by the second, almost as if he can’t feel the pain. It takes Kolivan reaching them and trying to cut the hand off so that the other would finally release Keith.

The moment he does, Keith just stays there. It doesn’t matter how much he wants to move, he knows it’s too late. Shiro will have already reached the ground. He’s frozen there, trapped in a nightmare. "Keith," Kolivan screams, pointing ahead.

It takes a minute for Keith to actually look in that direction, but when he does he sees Honnerva with a cube. It looks unstable, probably not formed one hundred percent thanks to Keith’s attack. She’s passing it to Zarkon, and Keith knows what will happen if they manage to take a hold of it.

Their power will grow, they’ll become unstoppable and Shiro’s dream will never come true. His sacrifice, because that’s what it is, will have been for naught.

Without Shiro, there is no reason for Keith to live. He doesn’t care about going back home, because there will be nothing of home left back in their apartment. He takes the decision right then and there.

Keith flies forward, puts all his flame into his own hand and takes the cube the same moment Zarkon does. He burns it, pushing with all his might towards the cube. He’s not sure if his flame will be enough to destroy it, he can only hope.

He hears Honnerva scream and Kolivan saying his name, but the next moment the cube breaks and the world turns white.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A couple of notes: Keith's powers are inspired by the inhumans, and this is where I reveal that I'm a comicbook nerd :P
> 
> A kudos and a comment really is worth a lot. We put a lot of love into this project.  
> As always you can find me on twitter AND tumblr @chiapslock


	3. 2012. Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for the delay in posting chapters. But work and life have been kind of terrible lately. For now on, to be a little more consistent with updates, we'll follow a schedule of a chapter every two weeks.  
> It's a little slower than what I would like, but unfortunately life has to take precedence.
> 
> Still, I'm glad to anyone who decided to give this fic a chance. And who decided to stick with it. Thank you everyone <3  
> Once again we have the work of the fantastic Lucia whom I love SO MUCH and that keeps making such INCREDIBLE ART for this fic. See this chapter's art piece [HERE](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15167405/chapters/36042420)!

 

When Keith opens his eyes, he's falling, plummeting to his death just like the day he activated his own powers. He has better control of them now, and it's easy to call the flames and stop in mid-air.

He takes a second to breathe and try to get his bearings. The last thing he remembers is touching the quintessence and forcing his flames on it, hoping to destroy it. Did it work? But if it did, how can he be alive?

It's then that he remembers something else, the horrible memory of Shiro falling down the ravine, of being unable to reach him. The moment the image flashes into his mind he turns and looks down, uncaring of how he survived. He might find Shiro, if he hurries, maybe his super strength allowed him to survive. If he finds him fast enough, maybe he'll be able to save him.

But when he looks down he doesn't see the mountain or the compound. There is a city under him, one that looks like any sci-fi novel Keith has ever read - with buildings too tall to be real. He looks around, hoping to find some kind of clue to help him understand where he is, and he stops.

The flame flickers, sensing his shock, but he sees the Statue of Liberty and he feels his breath becoming quicker, panicked. He can't be in New York. The last time he had seen it, two years ago, it had looked nothing like this.

It must be a dream or the after-life. Maybe a trick of the Galra, or the quintessence he had held in his hand. After all, it had corrupted both Zarkon and Honnerva beyond recognition, why couldn't it give Keith hallucinations?

He starts to descend, feeling dread crawl inside him. What will he find one he reaches the ground? What awaits him in this nightmare?

Keith has almost reached the roof of one of this imposing buildings when he sees from the corner of his eye, something flies towards him. His instincts tell him to get ready for a fight and he does so. Just because he thinks this is a hallucination, doesn't mean he has to be stupid about it.

The moment he sees what exactly is flying towards him he almost loses control of his powers.

Keith has seen many things during the war - the Galra technology surpassing anything they had on earth - but what he's seeing now overshadows even that. A robot, painted in green, stops in front of him, flying just like Keith. There is nothing human about it but his shape, and it doesn't seem to be flying thanks to flames like Keith is.

"Oh wow, he wasn't kidding…" the robot says, and his voice is almost completely metallic. Keith can't even believe his eyes. Still, should he really be lowering his guard because there is a talking robot in front of him? He shakes his head and prepares a fireball.

"No! Wait, stop!" the robot says, raising his own hands. "I don't want to hurt you, I think Kolivan would actually hate me and do you know how hard it would be to use the Blade's resources if he hated me? Hard!"

Keith blinks surprised by the onslaught of words, but he's sure he heard… "Kolivan?" he asks. His voice sounds uncertain, but the robot immediately nods.

"Yes! Kolivan! You were buddies, right?" the robot seems to be trying to be as non-threatening as possible. "He wants to talk with you. Please just follow me? I think it would actually be illegal for me to hit you."

"What?" Keith can't help but ask, but the robot just shakes his head.

"Oh no, I'm not explaining any of this. Just… follow me before anyone down there sees you?" the robot begs, "it would really make it easier for us."

Keith hesitates for a second, but what does he have to lose? "You'll bring me to Kolivan?" he asks, and the robot nods frantically. He's still not sure if he should trust this, but he needs to understand what's going on, and if someone can it's Kolivan.

 

 

The robot flies faster than Keith, but it seems to slow down before they can actually lose each other. Keith wonders if maybe he's another tool built by the aliens. The Galra possessed the technological knowledge for it, after all, and after everything Keith has seen, nothing seems impossible.

They fly for probably ten minutes before the robot starts ascending and making sure Keith is following. For all of their flight, Keith has been looking in front of himself (making sure not to lose his impromptu guide) but also down towards the city.

It looks like New York - certain places are impossible to mistake - but it also seems completely different. A part of him is starting to think that maybe he's in an alternative universe. Or that maybe, even with all of their sacrifices, the aliens won the war in the end.

But if Kolivan is here, he reminds himself, then maybe there is hope that maybe Shiro survived. He clings to it with the desperation of a foolish man, but he thinks that letting go of it would be too hard.

They keep going up, but as much as Keith tries, he doesn't see anything in front of them. He's starting to think that maybe the robot is not as advanced as he had thought, that maybe it's malfunctioning when it stops.

It hovers in mid-air, waiting for Keith to catch up, and he doesn't let him wait too long. When Keith stops just beside the robot, its metallic head turns towards him. "So, we're here. Please mention to Kolivan that I was very good and didn't hit you even once."

Keith frowns, confused. "Why is this such a big concern?" he asks, remembering how the robot had worried about the same thing before.

"I might be on probation because I punched someone I shouldn't have punched. In my defense they were armed," the robot explains. There seems to be some intonation in his voice, almost as if the robot could mimic human feelings. If this was something Kolivan got his hands on, it would be an incredible tool in the war.

A moment of silence passes between them and Keith almost asks now what before something moves in the corner of his eye. He turns, fast, just in time to see something appear out of nowhere. It looks like a boat, but it's flying and Keith can swear there was nothing there mere seconds before.

"That's the helicarrier," the robot tells him, probably looking at his shocked expression, "It's awesome. I could probably make it better, but it's still awesome. I made the cloaking device."

Keith doesn't really comprehend what the robot is telling him, too stunned to react, and he watches as it flies towards the _Helicarrier_. It takes a moment for him to follow. In all his years fighting the Galra, he has never seen anything like this.

Keith lands on the surface of the _ship_ , besides the robot, but he keeps looking around. The theory about an alternative reality is looking more realistic by the second. As advanced Galra's technology was, he thinks Kolivan would have mentioned invisible flying ships before.

"You're looking a little green," the robot tells him and Keith guesses there is something ironic in a _green robot_ commenting on that. He'll be able to appreciate it when he feels less in shock. "I told them this might not have been the best idea."

He doesn't know what the robot means or who _they_ are, but before he can ask anything he notices someone advancing towards them. He would recognize that walk anywhere.

Kolivan looks the same as the last time Keith has seen him. Mere minutes for Keith, but he can't help but wonder how long it had been for Kolivan.

"Keith," Kolivan says, the moment he's close enough. Keith knows that there are many things he should ask about, details that don't make sense, but he also knows what he's going to ask before the words leave his lips.

Keith's world has always revolved around one single thing, after all.

"Is he okay?" he asks, his voice catching slightly. He's not ready to know the answer to this question, and yet he can't stand to wait another minute to know.

Kolivan doesn't ask him to clarify; Keith has always appreciated someone who was always frank.

"We searched for him after you destroyed the Quintessence, but we couldn't find anything." There is no inflection in his voice and Keith knows that this is just how Kolivan is. The same thing that made Keith praise him just minutes before now awakens his flame.

Shiro deserved more. More than a cold mountain, more than being abandoned. Keith turns around at that moment, ready to fly over there. He's not close enough that he'll be able to reach it, but there is no logic in the way his flames burn.

"Stop," Kolivan orders and Keith almost laughs in his face. Keith has never taken orders from anyone. Some days not even Shiro could get him to listen and he thinks that Keith would ever stop? Still, Kolivan continues, uncaring of Keith's rage. "You won't find anything now. You've been away for seventy years."

That makes him pause. He looks at Kolivan, and then at the green robot. The ship and the city, more advanced than anything Keith could have ever imagined. Alternative universe, he had thought.

"What?" his voice is shaky, he knows, but there is nothing he can do about it.

"Maybe we shouldn't just... unload all of this on him right now," the robot says, but it's obvious this robot doesn't know Kolivan. Or Keith.

Kindness isn't a word that Keith associates with Kolivan, and it has never been a bad thing. Even now, Keith knows he'll appreciate someone telling him all the truth immediately instead of playing a sick game of guessing.

It doesn't mean that he's able to appreciate it now.

"Seventy years have passed since you touched the stone. You and Zarkon disappeared and for a long time we thought you were dead," Kolivan explains, before pointing in the robot's direction. "It was Green Paladin that noticed strange readings. The first sighting was almost a month ago."

Keith blinks, uncomprehending, and the robot nods. "Quintessence has a very particular signature, so it's easy to track. Not that there is that much of it anymore to track, but... we figured out that it was a portal opening weeks ago," the robot explains. "We just didn't know who was coming out of it, so I was sent to make sure it was safe"

"Seventy years," Keith repeats. And what he means is he has been dead for seventy years. They had dreamed of a life together, and while they had always known that it was a fantasy, they had never imagined this.

There is no trace of Shiro in this world, and Keith hates it.

No one talks for a second before Kolivan takes a step back. "Why don't you come inside, Keith? Let us explain."

What does it matter, he wonders. Does he want to know more when everything they have told him has been a punch in the gut?

Still, what other choice does he have? There is nothing waiting for him in the snow, even if he manages to fly back there. Seventy years later, if he manages to find Shiro's body, there would be nothing but bones. Nothing of the man he had loved.

Kolivan walks inside and Keith follows.

 

**2012**

 

 

They give him a room inside the helicarrier. They had offered him another place to stay, an actual home inside the city if he decided he wanted to be part of a team of superheroes. Kolivan had described it as the evolution of the work Keith and Shiro had done. What they were always meant to become after the war.

Keith had refused immediately, feeling sick to his stomach.

The room he lives in, instead, is small, spartan, and Keith enjoys the fact that it looks nothing like the outside world. It's quiet in this room and most days Keith loathes leaving it.

Kolivan explained to him how the Blades had evolved over the years, after Zarkon's defeat. They have become some kind of Black Op, much like Shiro was supposed to be. What surprises him the most is that, apparently, the general public knows about superheroes and aliens and, by now, it's just an accepted part of reality.

After the war, the tale of the Black Paladin had reached the population and everyone had been taught the story of the brave soldier who had sacrificed himself for his nation. Keith, funny enough, had been relegated to the role of a sidekick.

He doesn't really mind, he knows that Shiro's story is better for the propaganda. It just makes him sick to see them using Shiro this way.

They love Shiro, Kolivan tells him, and Keith wants to _rage_ . What do they know of Shiro, really? Only what someone else had told them. Nothing _important_.

Yet, in some ways, he's glad that they remember him. That Shiro's memory lives on even in this century.

 

 

Closed in his room, Keith studies.

They give him what they call a _Holtpad_ and they teach him how to use the internet.

Keith now has an entire library ready to be accessed. He _googles_ everything he can. The story he has missed, but also the one he has lived. It's strange to see the war in black and white, and so different from what he remembers.

Books make their fight seem without failures, Shiro and Keith come out of most stories unscathed like the battle hadn't even fazed them. They had won, and that seemed to be the only thing history focused about.

Keith knows the truth. Knows how hard it had been, how every day had been a struggle. And what they write in the history books it's nothing like real life.

When he gets sick of reading about himself and Shiro, he branches into more recent history. He catches up as quickly as he can, but some nights he just has to stop reading and wonder what kind of world is the one he woke up in.

Shiro would love it, he thinks, this much knowledge available to so many people. Shiro who never had the opportunity to study, who always had to work for anything.

The day he reads about _pride_ and LGBT movement he has to stop reading for a while. He puts down the pad and leaves his room for the first time in what feels like years.

They could have had it all, he thinks hysterically. They could have had a house with a single bedroom, they could have had dates where they didn't need to invite anyone else in order to keep up appearances. They could have kissed in public instead that in front of a fire, scared that it might have been the last time.

Everything is so _unfair_.

History doesn't remember them as a couple. Keith doesn't know why Kolivan had kept quiet, maybe to preserve their memory. They talk about them like the _best of friends_ . The _brotherhood_ of the century and Keith wants to laugh.

 _We fucked each other whenever we could_ , he wants to scream, _what part of that was a brotherhood_.

The gym, when he arrives there, it's quiet. In the month he has been on the helicarrier it's the first time he sees it so barren. It must be late at night, but Keith is grateful for the silence. He's not in a talkative mood.

He punches the first punching bag he finds and then he does it again. He keeps punching until his hands start to burn. Figuratively, but also literally.

It shouldn't be as much of a surprise when the punching bag catches fire, but Keith still takes a step back, shocked. His breathing is labored, his forehead drenched in sweat. His hands engulfed in flames.

It lasts only a second before water rains down from the ceiling, and Keith looks up, startled. A second later someone bursts through the door. There is a man there, panting, obviously in a panic like he knew what had just happened. The Blades probably had someone spying on Keith every minute, he's not really surprised.

"Did someone catch _fire_ ?" the man asks, between a wheeze and another. Keith looks back at the now completely burnt punching back and shrugs. "Did you just... did you just _shrug? What the fuck_."

Keith doesn't really care about this so he just shakes his head and tries to move past the agent. The other stops him, looking at him like he's crazy.

"Where are you going? You can't just go all blazing fury on our equipment and then _leave_!"

For a moment Keith contemplates asking him 'who is going to stop me?'. As much as Keith has spent the last month avoiding anyone, it's also obvious that everyone has spent the last month avoiding _him_.

Every visit had been brief. Even Kolivan had seemed to be tip-toeing around Keith. It made him feel like a feral animal kept in a cage.

What can this one agent do to him? He has the power to burn him to a crisp with just a flicker of his wrist.

The moment he thinks that he knows he has gone too far.

Keith sags, looking inside the room. He's wet from the workout and the water, and he's _tired_. There isn't a specific reason for his exhaustion. His entire life exhausts him.

He just wants to sleep.

"I'm sure someone recorded me," Keith says, all his fighting spirit leaving him, "you can show them that. You won't get in trouble."

The agent sputters and then shakes his head. "Yeah, _of course_ , but that's not the point. I know everyone is treating you like a war hero - which I guess you are - but I don't think it's good if we keep babying you. So," the agent looks at him, raising an eyebrow, "You're going to fix this. Apologize to the people that built the machinery in the gym and then change the punching bag."

"What?" Keith asks, a little confused and taken aback. The agent simply raises his eyebrow higher.

Keith almost wants to laugh. What is all this? What's even happening?

He wonders if he told this stranger what he had discovered tonight if he would be more compassionate. He doesn't _want to_ , but for the first time in his life, he realizes he can.

Before he can say anything, however, something shakes the ship and they both catch themselves on the walls.

"Oh man, why _always_ when I have the night shift?" the stranger murmurs and Keith blinks confusedly.

In the month he has lived on this ship, it had never shaken like this and he realizes immediately that something is very wrong.

"Come on fire boy," the agent yells, starting to run, "I think you might have found something better to burn to a crisp."

Keith watches him run away, and for a moment he doesn't follow him. Whatever is happening it's not _his_ fight. Why should he do anything? Whatever it is, he's sure Kolivan and the others have it all under control. Still, the agent hadn't been wrong. There is a rage that courses through Keith's veins a desperation that begs to be unleashed.

If whatever is happening can be a valid target for it, why shouldn't Keith use the situation to his own advantage?

He starts to run before he even finishes the thought. He's not sure where he's going, having never bothered to learn the layout of the place, but he hopes that running straight will lead him somewhere.

Thankfully it seems he wasn't that far from the bridge when he had landed that first day and he bursts out, flames already blazing in his hands.

He sees the agent from before, a lot of Galra soldiers and Kolivan looking at someone Keith didn't recognize.

There is a woman standing in the middle of the pad. She doesn't look bothered by the rain or the wind, or the dozen people raising their weapons at her. There is a certain elegance in her face, but there is nothing but steel in her eyes.

Keith recognizes it immediately. Whoever she is, she's not one to be trifled with.

Kolivan takes a step forward. He looks calm on the outside, in complete control, but Keith has seen Kolivan in plenty of life and death situations and at this point, he can recognize the signs. Kolivan is not as put together as he would like to pretend, there is a nervousness in his movements. A tension that sets Keith on edge.

"Princess Allura," Kolivan says, with an elegant bow, "we weren't expecting your visit. It's a pleasure."

Keith tries to think if he ever heard this name before, but his mind draws a blank.

"Kolivan," the woman says, with a small smile, "it has been many vargas, I agree. And I wished I came here with better news."

Kolivan hesitates a second before nodding. He murmurs something that Keith couldn't catch and then he side steps, extending his arm. "Nothing we can't talk about inside, I hope. Your father wouldn't be happy with me if I let his daughter stand in the rain too long."

A flicker of hurt obscures the face of the woman, but it's gone as soon as it arrived. "Thank you, Kolivan."

She walks with a purpose, a certain strength in her step.

It takes a minute for Keith to recognize it, but once he does, it's impossible to ignore: the Princess walks like a general going into war. He wonders who is the antagonist of the war she's preparing herself to face: them or someone else?

"Man, this isn't going to be fun," the agent from before says and Keith can't help but agree.

 

 

He's not really surprised when Kolivan calls him to a meeting room. War was never a thing to be dealt with quietly or privately.

Keith is surprised to see that he's not the only one in the room when he arrives. There is the Green Robot he had seen the first day, the agent from the night before and another man he had never seen. On the other side of the room, Kolivan and Princess Allura were looking at them, analyzing them.

Keith knew what they wanted before they even said anything.

He takes a seat and waits. They will explain each other soon enough, and there is no need to appear more invested in this than he is.

"You might wonder why we called you here," Kolivan starts, looking at them all. "First of all let me introduce you to Keith Kogane, code name Red Paladin." He doesn't say anything else, but Keith guesses that there is no need to say anything more. Keith's life, or at least a version of it, is printed in every history book.

"Keith, these are a special unit created some time ago. They are all human with extraordinary abilities. This is Green Paladin," he says, motioning to the robot. The robot waves and it strikes Keith as odd that, in the future, machines seem to be so similar to humans. It's not the first time he has thought so, that there is something almost human-like to this machine. But what does Keith know?

"This is Blue Paladin," Kolivan starts, but the agent beats him to the punch.

"You can call me Lance," he says with a cocky grin, "I'm the resident sharpshooter who never misses a shot. And this," he points at the last man, "is Hunk. Or Yellow Paladin. Or the dude you should apologize to because you burnt his equipment."

Keith blinks, surprised, and turns towards Hunk. The man doesn't seem to be offended, and he's smiling amused at Lance.

"I'm Hunk. I craft most of the equipment here. I will have to see if I can make a fire-proof punching bag. Green will help," he explains, and he seems good-natured, unlike _Lance_.

Still, Keith does feel a little bad that he destroyed the equipment. He's ready to apologize when the Princess clears her throat.

"My name is Allura, and I'm the princess of planet Altea." Keith remembers Altea from Kolivan's tales. The planet that had taken in the Galra after their own planet's destruction. It surprises him how similar to humans Alteans are. Used to seeing the Galra, it's strange to associate the idea of _alien_ to someone who is so similar to them. "I'm here to warn you. It has been difficult in Altea these past few _deca-phoebs_. After Zarkon and Haggar plan failed- which I can assure you no one knew the full extent of it - the Galra were left in shambles."

"We did ask anyone who wanted to join us, but only on the condition that they respected the rightful owners of this planet," Kolivan explains, shaking his head. "Not many accepted."

"By that time," Allura rushes to explain, "we fear that the quintessence had already started to influence their mind. We don't know how it got so bad, but we assume it's also the reason why Diabazaal was destroyed."

Kolivan only nods, and there is a certain rigidity to him. Kolivan has never been one to relax, but the tension Keith can see it's strange nonetheless.

"When we helped the Galra, we did so with an understanding that it would have been a temporary solution. Not because they weren't welcomed, but because our planet can't hold that many people. Altea is beautiful but small." She stops, looking down at her own hands, "I fear that the situation has become... impossible to control. The Galra need the quintessence, and they think they can find it here."

"They are invading us? Again?" the Green Paladin, asks, confused. Allura flinches slightly.

"I still believe they can be reasoned with. Prince Lotor, Haggar and Zarkon's son- we grew up together. He's not a monster, nor his mind is fogged by the addiction to quintessence," she rushes to explain, a little desperate. "If we can only manage to _talk_ with them."

"And yet," Keith says, looking at her, " you came here ahead of your people, ahead of him, to warn us. That doesn't bode well."

Lance and Hunk both nod, while Allura looks straight at him. He's reminded of how he had described her mere hours ago. She's still, this princess, and there is a war raging in her heart.

"I'm here to protect them," she sounds proud, but her voice shakes slightly. Not enough to consider her hesitant, but enough to make Keith pause.

"Starting a war with Lotor is not in our best interests," Kolivan says, looking at them, "if the situation can be resolved peacefully, it would be better. If it can't..."

No one talks, the phrase left hanging in the air like the smell of gunpowder in the early morning. Keith closes his eyes and tries to send the memories away.

"We want to reinstate the Paladin project," Kolivan continues, after a second. "Obviously Green, Lance, and Hunk have already been briefed. But we would like to ask you again, Keith, to take back your role as the Red Paladin."

Keith looks at them and he shakes his head. "Shiro was the only one that was a part of the Paladin Project," he reminds Kolivan, "I just followed him. And I'm not... I can't be..." he stops, his words strangling him.

How can he be the Red Paladin without Shiro? They were supposed to be a team, and now Keith is _alone_. "I'll help," he says after a second, "but I won't be part of any team."

" _Dude_ , come on!" Lance exclaims, but Keith doesn't care about his opinion or anyone else's.

Kolivan silences him with a single glance and then nods in Keith's direction.

"That is your choice to make." Keith can read between the line, hears the reprobation loud and clear, but just squares his shoulder against it.

It is his decision and he won't change his mind.

"Lotor will arrive soon, we don't have much time," Allura urges them and in a second everyone's mood switches.

It's not time to talk about the future, not when war is coming right at their doorstep.

 

 

Keith doesn't know what he had expected Lotor to look like. His memories of both Haggar and Zarkon are not great, and by the time Keith had seen them, they had already been consumed by their greed for quintessence.

Still, he has seen enough Galra to imagine something. Something that Lotor _isn't_.

He looks much more Altean than Galran, and if he had seen Allura and Lotor side by side, he could have mistaken them for brother and sister. Beside Lotor's purple skin.

Lotor is not alone, and everyone who accompanies him seems as far as Keith's idea of Galran as it's possible.

"Allura," Lotor says, with a pleasant smile. On the surface, it's impossible to say that Lotor isn't being genuine, but there is something that makes Keith's skin crawl. "Your presence here is a surprise. I would have expected you at home, after the recent tragedy."

Allura shakes her head, "my father wanted to stop this before it became too big to be stopped. I'm honoring his decision."

Lotor looks at her and then around to everyone else. "I do not know what Allura has told you about us," he starts, "but we don't want a fight. We only need some of the Quintessence that this planet seems to create in excess. We need it, and you don't."

It's concise and there really doesn't seem to be any sign of hostility emanating from him. Still, Keith can't help but feel cautious.

"Prince Lotor," Kolivan says, taking a step forward, "We understand your plight, but I fear Earthling stopped collecting quintessence a long time ago. The repercussion for the planet was too dire to persevere."

Lotor furrows his brow, before looking back towards the alien accompanying him. They don't need words to communicate, and for a moment Keith envies the strong camaraderie they share.

"Surely there is some you can spare?" Lotor insists, "We have tried to find another planet with such high concentration of quintessence, but our research has proven fruitless."

When Kolivan doesn't say anything more, Lotor takes a step forward. Everyone tenses and the prince, noticing it, just smiles at them.

His movements are fluid, like someone that doesn't really fear anything. "I remember you, Kolivan, and your aversion to the Quintessence, even while we were still on hour dear Daizabaal. But a lot of our brothers weren't as wise as you were. They need the quintessence now, and the low supply we receive is not enough."

Kolivan looks at him, without showing any kind of emotion. "I understand, but there is no Quintessence that we can give you. I'm sorry."

"They speak the truth, Lotor," Allura says, finally stepping forward and reaching the other prince. She puts a hand on his arm, and for a moment they really look like siblings. "It has been difficult, but we can double our searches, and until we find a suitable planet, Altea will forever be your home too."

Lotor looks towards her and for a moment a genuine soft expression flashes in his eyes. It's gone as fast as it arrives, but it's enough for Keith to notice it.

Prince Lotor nods, looking back at his entourage, and they seem to understand the message immediately.

"I understand. I will tell my people that there is nothing for us here," he says, taking a step back. "I'll report everything you told me today."

"Lotor," Allura calls him, "we'll see each other on Altea, right?"

Lotor starts walking back towards the ship he had arrived in, but he looks back at Allura with a smile. "Wherever else would I go?"

Just like they arrived, they are gone. Painless. Too easy.

"Well! It seems we were all concerned for no reason at all!" Lance says with a big smile. Everyone else around them relaxes, but Keith has his eyes trained on Allura. The princess doesn't look like someone who has won a battle.

"Lotor was never one to back down so easily," Allura says, closing her eyes.

"But he said he understood!" Hunk exclaims, pointing in the direction where Lotor's ship had disappeared. "You think he's going to attack us anyway?"

"No. I think he'll do exactly as he said," she replies to him, stoic.

"He'll tell them Earth has quintessence," Kolivan continues, "enough to sustain them, but isn't willing to help."

"That will cause outrage," Green says immediately, tense.

"Of course it will," Allura says, shaking her head. "And not only among Galra. My people are tired, the resources on Altea have stretched thin already."

"They'll feel like this war is justified. Like _Earth_ is the villain in the story," Kolivan continues. He looks up at the sky for a second before looking back at his own men. "Get ready, we might need to fight soon."

"Oh God," Hunk says, looking around, "why it's always fighting? Why can't it come down to a simple game of catch once in a while? I really don't want to do this."

"Come on, big guy," Lance reassures him with a touch on the shoulders. "There's nothing for you to be afraid of."

"But I'm _always_ afraid," Hunk cries and the robot laughs.

"Work on being always angry, Hunk," Green tells him, "I think we'll need that."

Hunk only sighs and shakes his head.

Keith hasn't really followed the entire conversation, but he can't help but think that these people are strange. How is he supposed to trust them enough to fight with them when he doesn't feel any kind of connection to them?

Still, he won't have a choice.

 

 

Hours later, nothing has really happened. Keith and the other _paladins_ are sitting in the same meeting room. Green and Hunk are fiddling with screens and science that Keith doesn't really understand, while Lance is fixing his gun.

The entire room is tense, and the waiting is not really helping anyone's nerves. He thinks that Shiro would have said something, would have found the words to make them feel better, to make them feel more like a team.

To make _Keith_ feel more like he belonged there.

He looks down at himself and at the uniform he hadn't put on since the day he had arrived in the future. It feels strange to be dressed like this again.

"Are we sure someone is coming, right?" Lance asks, at some point, looking at Allura. The princess hasn't moved from her spot on the window for the last hour. "Maybe Lotor just returned to your home!"

Allura doesn't reply for a second, and Lance sighs and turns back to his own gun. When Allura talks, her voice is weaker than Keith would have expected. "My father was a kind man," she says, surprising all of them, "he was a good king. He's gone now and I had a choice. I could have stayed home and mourned him, or I could have flown here to stop this."

There is a sadness in her voice and in her face. Keith doesn't doubt the strength inside her, but at the same time, she looks tired. Wore down by a fight they haven't witnessed. "You haven't seen the Galra, they _need_ the quintessence, and what we're able to provide without destroying planet after planet, isn't enough for them."

No one speaks for a second, and Keith wonders if any of them have ever fought a Galra. He remembers their desperation, during the war. He thinks Allura wants to make them feel pity for them, but Keith doesn't have space for anything but anger or sorrow in him.

"I understand the Galra, more or less," the robot says, looking up from what it was working on, "but why would your people help them?"

"They won't," she replies immediately, turning towards them, "They just won't stop them."

"Aren't you the queen now?" Hunk asks, "can't you just _order_ them to stop?"

Allura seems to flinch at his words, and Keith knows her pain. Feels it in his own skin every day.

"When my coronation arrives," Allura recites, with a tired voice, "I will be crowned Queen of the Alteans. The Galra are not under my command. They are under Lotor's."

"So we just have to wish that psycho prince didn't just send his entire army against us?" Lance scoffs, pointing his gun at the wall, "just great. Because this is what we needed this week."

"You must understand," Allura intercedes, "they have lost _everything_. Lotor more so than others. Zarkon and Haggar might have been... consumed by the Quintessence by the end, but they were his parents."

"We all have lost someone," Keith intercedes, with more bite than Allura probably deserves, "and we have to learn to live with it." He refuses to feel bad for Zarkon _or_ his witch. Keith had already paid a way too high cost for their defeat.

Allura seems to be ready to say something else, but an alarm blasts inside the base and they all know that the moment of peace is over.

Lance gets up immediately and starts walking towards the door. He looks towards Hunk and smiles. "I hope you're ready to get angry, buddy."

Hunk just sighs and gets up. "I'm only ready to vomit. I really don't like _turning_."

Keith wonders what that means, but before he can ask, the rest of the group runs out of the room, leaving Keith standing there. He knows that he should follow them, but this is the first time he will go into battle without Shiro and he feels weaker for it.

Still, how disappointed would Shiro be if he let the world be destroyed after he gave up his own life to save it?

"This is for you, Shiro," he whispers and then follows the others outside.

**Author's Note:**

> Again, you can find the art for the first chapter here: [boy look at this goodie](http://lucia-ik.tumblr.com/post/175550952839/my-supernova-piece-for-chiapslock-tumblr-why)  
> New chapter is out every week. This time the fic is done so you can count on it lol
> 
> A kudos and a comment really is worth a lot. We put a lot of love into this project.  
> As always you can find me on twitter AND tumblr @chiapslock


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